You feel that a young woman you recently met would be perfect for your nephew, although you can’t pinpoint exactly why. In fact, she is 5-foot-2 and your tall nephew has said he doesn’t want a short girl. She’s also from New York, and your nephew says he wants an out-of-towner. However, she was at your Shabbos table and seemed very pleasant, mature and kindhearted. Should you suggest her?
THE DILEMMA
We may suggest a shidduch without doing research; that’s the parties’ responsibility. However, we should not suggest a match unless: We know of no reason why the relationship would harm either party; we believe that the match has a reasonable chance of resulting in an engagement; we know of no medical, emotional or character flaw that would make either party an unfit spouse; we feel that neither party will have a negative influence on the other, and neither party has a strong objection to any trait of the other.
Sefer Chofetz Chaim, see Tziyurim.
Reviewed by Rabbi Moshe Mordechai Lowy, shlita. For discussion only; pls consult a rav. From Chofetz Chaim Heritage Foundation's Shabbos Menu [email protected].
THE HALACHA
