Sometimes, it happens that it proves difficult to gather the whole family.... Very good. There are enough ways of helping one another and caring for one another without poking out their eyes. Sometimes we see that a certain sibling is hesitant to join. Don’t pressure them! He said that it doesn’t work for him to come... leave him alone. Don’t tell him, “Because of you, the whole thing will be ruined.” Use a little seichel. It’s obvious that it will cause him pain to come. Why don’t you think a little.... Thinking is part of being a yerei Shamayim!
When Klal Yisrael was in the Midbar and they positioned their doorways away from one another, it required forethought. If they had done it without thinking, their doorways would surely have turned out opposite one another in some cases. It took thinking and intentionality to ensure that they didn’t. We can see this when buildings are built for those who don’t need a sukkah, so all the porches are positioned one above the other. But when a building is built for Yidden who need to build a sukkah, the builder will ensure that each one is built away from the other. It all comes down to seichel.
This is how it looks when people do think. We must think about others. The question is not whether to think or not to think, but what to think about. That is, you should think about another person’s lack—but not for the purpose of hurting him, but rather in order to help him. A person doesn’t have the liberty to say, “I didn’t think... because I didn’t want to mind his business.” No! You’re obligated to think about him—but only in the right way!
