Included in the ‘Baal Korchoch’ that our Rabbis of blessed memory mention, is the ‘Baal Korchoch Ata Chay!’ [you are Forced to live – not always willingly.] meaning, that life is not always lined up with pleasure or at least calm with no pain. From time to time, one must repeat to himself strongly and diligently that ‘Baal Korchoch Ata Chay’ and whatever the merciful one does, is for the good.
For those with a pessimistic tendency, Toiras Chassidus can help. Starting from the Baal-Shem-Tov who taught that serving Hashem should be B’simcha! Even while doing Teshuva for bad choices, it does not contradict part of yourself being happy who you are now, as explained at length in Tanya.
In life we see that the effect of a life event is in accordance with how the person accepts and reacts to it. Do we need a better example than the Rambam, whose life on the outside appeared to have hardship, pain and tragedy rachamana litzlan, and yet, he had a positive outlook on life. As we can see from his Sefer ‘Moreh Nevuchim’ that his take on life was very positive and optimistic. On the other hand, there are people who appear very successful, and you seldom see satisfaction on their faces.
Particularly, in your case, that it was not by your choice, Toiras Chassidus will teach you to find a happy [positive] side to it or at least a redeeming solution for the past. Therefore, you should tone down the negative reaction, bitterness and especially the sadness that overcame you. See Tanya Chapter 26.
We were assured by our Rabbis and in [Tanya,] Igeres Hakodesh, Siman 22: [That if you react positively to a negative situation] Then Hashem will give you open and revealed good, as opposed to the good that was hidden in negativity…