Observing the masses, we notice that some may capitulate in despair upon failing in a certain area. An example of this is one who wakes up late. He may feel that since he messed up the beginning of his day, he may as well mess up the rest of the day. We need to salvage what we can and never despair.
The Kotzker Rebbe remarked that just as in business one doesn’t give up if he is not successful, one should do the same in spirituality. An expression to keep in mind: “Pain is temporary. Quitting lasts forever.”
It has been said, “Failure inspires winners and defeats losers.” A saying to keep in mind is, “We were not born winners or losers. We were born choosers.” R’ Nachman of Breslov remarked, “We need to start over each day and sometimes many times a day.” Sichos Haran 48. If one was involved in a car accident, he wouldn’t continue to smash into others. In this way there will be damage control. Likewise, in spirituality one needs to pick himself up when he falls and not let there be a domino effect.
We can take a lesson of not giving up and starting even at an old age from Colonel Harland Sanders (1890-1980), the founder of KFC (Kentucky Fried Chicken). He tried to start several companies and was fired from a number of jobs. At the age of 65, after running a restaurant for several years, Colonel Sanders found himself penniless. He retired and received his first social security check which was $105. Colonel Sanders loved to share his fried chicken recipe and opted to sell the world on it. He traveled door to door to houses and restaurants all over his local area, but was met with little enthusiasm. He started traveling by car to different restaurants and cooked his fried chicken on the spot for restaurant owners. If the owner liked the chicken, they would enter into a handshake agreement to sell his chicken. He was turned down 1,009 times before his chicken was accepted once! By 1964, Colonel Sanders had 600 franchises selling his trademark chicken. He sold his company for $2 million dollars ($15.3 million today). At the time of his death, there were around 6,000 KFC locations in 48 countries. Today, there are more than 25,000 KFC restaurants in over 145 countries and territories around the world and has 820,000 employees. This man started at the age of 65, when most retire, and built a global empire out of fried chicken.
Someone once wrote: “Success is failure turned inside out. The silver tint of the clouds of doubt, and you can never tell how close you are, It may be near when it seems so far; so stick to the fight when your hardest hit, it’s when things seem worse, that you must not quit.”
It has been said, “It is not how hard you hit. It is how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. That is how winning is done.”
Natural Pearls form when an irritant, usually a parasite, works its way into an oyster, mussel or clam. As a defense mechanism, a fluid is used to coat the irritant. Layer upon layer of this coating, called “nacre,” is deposited until a lustrous pearl is formed. So, a pearl is formed from rough times! Indeed, מרגליות, pearls is a contraction of מר גלית, revelation from the bitter since a pearl comes to being through irritation.
The greatest mistake people make is confusing the word fail with the word failure. Just because you failed, it doesn’t make you a failure. Learn why you failed and then you will be better off than a person who never failed. The more failures one has, the closer he is to success (if he learns from those failures).
One major piece of advice that made the wealthy Jewish philanthropist Bernie Marcus successful was what his mother ingrained in him in his childhood: “There will be setbacks in your life. But don’t be discouraged. You must move on!” In 1978, Bernie Marcus was fired from a do-it-yourself hardware store called Handy Dan. Just one year after being fired, Marcus teamed up with a fellow businessman by the name of Arthur Blank to start a little store called The Home Depot. Today, The Home Depot is the largest home improvement retailer in the world with over 2,200 stores with nearly half a million employees and over $100 billion in revenue.
At times the frustrations of life may get to us causing us to feel like caving in. We need to realize that when one perseveres, he is successful. “Winners never quit and quitters never win” is a frequently quoted saying. Let us keep in mind “When the going gets tough, let the tough get going.” When you are tough on life, life will be easier on you.
During the seven days of inauguration, the Mishkan was erected and dismantled. This alludes to that after one grows spiritually (symbolized by erecting a Mishkan) and then stumbles (represented by the dismantling), he should pick himself up and grow further (signified by erecting the Mishkan again).
We know stories of people who descended spiritually, which started with a small sin causing a ripple effect as in עבירה גוררת עבירה. We need to let go of the past situations in which we failed.
There is an expression, “They tried to bury us but they didn’t realize that we were seeds.”
A wise man once said: “Success is not final; failure is not fatal. It is the courage to continue that counts.”
There was a wealthy person who wanted to build a glorious mansion. As it was nearing completion, he decided that he wanted to put the finishing touches on it. He ascended to the roof to follow through on his plans when suddenly a wind blew him off the roof. Disoriented after falling to the ground, he screamed, “My mansion has fallen.” The people nearby told him, “Only you fell but the mansion is still standing. We will get the medical help you need and then you can enjoy your mansion.” Throughout life, we build our mansions. However at times we get blown off and think our mansion has collapsed. That is to say, we sin and think all that we have worked to amass is gone. The truth is though, all the Torah, Mitzvos and good deeds remain despite our sins. We just need to get back up on our feet.
Avos 4:2.
Breishis 4:6.
Devarim 34:12, Rashi. The Gemara (Avoda Zara 4b, see Rashi s.v. לא עשו) says that the Jews made the golden calf in order to give encouragement to Baalai Teshuva.
There is a saying, “Nobody can go back and create a new beginning, but everyone can start today and create a new ending.”
Breishis 4:4.
In commenting on the episode of Kayin and Hevel, the Sforno (1470-1550) says that when something needs rectification, don’t be pained over the past, rather make an effort in what needs to be fixed up.
The Torah ends with telling us about the shattering of the Luchos which was a result of the grievous sin of the golden calf. Then we begin again with בראשית. That is ב' ראשית — a new beginning, a second chance.
