THE WISDOM OF SILENCE
Shlomo HaMelech said, “There is a time to speak and a time to be silent.” Chazal teach us to speak words of Torah, but to minimize unnecessary chatter.
(קהלת ג, ז, חולין פט)
Rabban Shimon ben Gamliel said, “All my days I have grown up among chachomim and have found nothing more beneficial for a person than silence.” Rebbi Akiva said, “A fence around wisdom is silence.” This refers to unnecessary speech in worldly matters.
Chazal say that silence is good for the wise; how much more is this true for others. The best remedy is silence, for it spares a person from many issues.
(אבות א,יז, ג,יג וברע"ב, פסחים צט ע"א)
Rambam speaks of five kinds of speech: (1) speaking as a mitzvah – such as studying Torah, which is equal to all other mitzvos; (2) forbidden speech – like falsehood, lashon hara, cursing others and unclean language; (3) Redundant speech which brings neither benefit nor harm – such as discussing current events and the news. (4) Commendable talk – praising positive things and noting the damaging effect of negative things. This includes praising the righteous and their doings so that others will follow their ways, and degrading the sinners and their conduct so that they will be despised in the eyes of all. This can also be done by relating a story or singing a song. (5) Permissible speech – that which is necessary for day-to-day living and for business. One should try to concentrate most of his speech on that which is a mitzva and commendable, and minimize the rest.
(פיהמ"ש לאבות א, יז)
In Eretz Yisroel they would say, “Speech is worth a sela, silence is worth two,” implying that even permissible speech should be limited.
(מגילה יח ע"א)
Chazal observe that HaShem placed the tongue behind two walls, the teeth and the lips, so that one refrain from inappropriate speech.
It is said that a person was created with two ears and one mouth, so that he knows to minimize his speech.
(ערכין טו ע"ב, ארחות צדיקים שער השתיקה)
The Me’iri writes: Unnecessary speech is no different than the sounds made by animals.
(ס' התמיד להמאירי ע' ב)
HOLY SPEECH
Since the power of speech is an expression of the Shechina within a person, one must try to use it for holy purposes. For this reason, the tongue is hidden in the mouth, just as a treasure is kept concealed and locked.
(ראשית חכמה שער הקדושה פי"א)
After the passing of R. Yehuda ben Shoshan in the upper Galil, he appeared in a dream to his talmid R. Lapidos; his face shone like the sun and each hair in his beard, like a blazing torch. The talmid asked what he had done to merit such kedusha, and he replied that throughout his lifetime he had not spoken unnecessarily. A person’s speech is similar to malochim and one should use it for kedusha.
(ראשית חכמה שער האהבה פ״ו)
The great chossid and mashpia Rashbatz would advise the chassidim who would fast, “Instead of fasting with your stomach, fast with your mouth!”
(לשמע אוזן ע' 222)
R. Levi Yitzchak of Berditchev would explain the possuk, “One should not desecrate his word; whatever leaves his mouth he should fulfill,” to mean that if one guards his speech, everything he says will be fulfilled by HaShem.
(קדושת לוי פ' מטות)
THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK
The chossid R. Zev Vilenker said about himself, “The Alter Rebbe’s look affected me in such a way that I should never speak without thinking.” Indeed, throughout his entire life, whenever a motion or hint would suffice, he would abstain from speaking.
(אג"ק הריי"צ ח"א ע' עדר)
R. Nachman of Breslov once said, “In our childhood we learn to speak, and as we age we learn to keep silent. That’s the problem! We learn to speak before we learn how to keep silent…”
(טללי תשובה ע' 219)
R. Avrohom, the Trisker Maggid, once said, “For yourself you do not need to speak, for thought would suffice; you only speak for the benefit of your friend. Stop and think for a moment: perhaps your friend is not interested in this ‘favor’ of yours…”
(טללי תשובה ע' 219)
When R. Simcha Bunim of Pshischa was instructed by his Rebbe, the Chozeh of Lublin, to journey to a small town, he asked some chassidim to join him, and they set out without knowing the purpose of their trip. When it was time to eat, R. Simcha and the chassidim were informed by their host that they were going to be served fleishigs, whereupon they began to question how the food had been prepared and delved into many halachic details. Suddenly, they were interrupted by a beggar, warming himself near the fireplace, “You are so careful with what goes into your mouths, but you don’t monitor what comes out – your words!”
When R. Simcha Bunim heard this, he understood why his Rebbe had sent him, and promptly set out on his journey home.
(סיפורי חסידים זוין תורה ע' 95)