Then there are the unspoken requests. Sometimes, a child won’t ask for something even if they want it very badly. As the parent, you want to know your children well enough to understand their needs, though of course we can only do our best and won’t always figure everything out. A child who, for whatever reason, doesn’t verbalize their feelings is no less deserving than one who asks nicely. If you feel it’s appropriate, you may certainly of your own accord give them something small on a sibling’s birthday, and tell them, “This is for you, because I want you to know that I’m thinking of you too and I want you to be happy.”
In addition, if a child demands or requests something that’s out of the question (either because of how it was demanded or what was requested), you can make it clear that you won’t be giving them what they want while you are choosing to give them something small instead. This is another good option as long as you don’t convey the impression that you are doing it out of fear of their reaction if you don’t.
