Parenting Post

By Sarah Chana Radcliffe

If your goal is to get what you want then, be sure your strategy will work....

Making a complaint leads to defensiveness rather than to positive change. “You never look at me when I speak to you,” is a complaint. Like all complaints, it does NOT create the change you are looking for. When you want your spouse or child to make a positive change, make a simple request like, “Please look at me when I’m speaking.” As soon as the person does what you’ve asked for, give positive feedback. “Thank you for looking my way - I really appreciate it!” This combo (ask for what you want and praise it when it happens) is the best - and most pleasant - way to help loved ones make enduring positive changes.