Humour
Shabbos Sippets | January 24, 2024
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Humour

Shabbos Sippets | December 10, 2025

What was the name of Pharoah's horse ?
Answer : Passuk 19 this week's Parsha ( First two words)

What do you call a girl standing in the middle of a tennis court?
Annette

What did the tennis player say before playing with vanilla ice cream? “I’d like a soft serve, please!”

A middle management executive has to take on some sport, by his doctor’s orders, so he decides to play tennis. After a couple of weeks his secretary asks him how he’s doing. “It’s going fine,” the manager says. “When I’m on the court and I see the ball speeding towards me, my brain immediately says, ‘To the corner! Back hand! To the net! Smash! Go back!'” “Really? What happens then?” the secretary asks. “Then my body says, ‘Who? Me? You must be kidding!”

What time does Andy Murray got to bed? Tennish.

My sister bet me that I couldn't build a car out of spaghetti.
You should've seen her face when I drove pasta.

How much does Chinese food weigh? Wonton

Luke Skywalker and Obi Wan are out at a Chinese restaurant and Luke is really battling trying to use the chopsticks to feed his face. After a while Obi Wan turns to him and says "use the forks luke".

My wife asked for peace and quiet while she cooked dinner. So I took the batteries out of the smoke alarm.

Meir smarty pants, always knocks on the fridge door before opening it, just in case there is a salad dressing inside.

What was the name of Pharoah's horse ?
Answer : Passuk 19 this week's Parsha ( First two words)

What do you call a girl standing in the middle of a tennis court?
Annette

What did the tennis player say before playing with vanilla ice cream? “I’d like a soft serve, please!”

A middle management executive has to take on some sport, by his doctor’s orders, so he decides to play tennis. After a couple of weeks his secretary asks him how he’s doing. “It’s going fine,” the manager says. “When I’m on the court and I see the ball speeding towards me, my brain immediately says, ‘To the corner! Back hand! To the net! Smash! Go back!'” “Really? What happens then?” the secretary asks. “Then my body says, ‘Who? Me? You must be kidding!”

What time does Andy Murray got to bed? Tennish.

My sister bet me that I couldn't build a car out of spaghetti.
You should've seen her face when I drove pasta.

How much does Chinese food weigh? Wonton

Luke Skywalker and Obi Wan are out at a Chinese restaurant and Luke is really battling trying to use the chopsticks to feed his face. After a while Obi Wan turns to him and says "use the forks luke".

My wife asked for peace and quiet while she cooked dinner. So I took the batteries out of the smoke alarm.

Meir smarty pants, always knocks on the fridge door before opening it, just in case there is a salad dressing inside.

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