It Wasnt Exactly a Shining Moment
BET Journal | January 26, 2024
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It Wasnt Exactly a Shining Moment

BET Journal | December 10, 2025

It wasn't exactly terrible, but it wasn't exactly a shining moment. It definitely was, however, the makings of a great story. If you and some friends engage in a "misadventure," can you tell the story? Because you're including yourself as one of the "guilty parties," you obviously don't feel that the story is really damaging. But what about the others?

THE DILEMMA

Your newly-licensed son wants to drive a group of friends to an out-of-town wedding. Remembering back to your younger years, you recall a similar situation in which you and two cousins drove through the night at warp speed, got pulled over, didn't have the registration to show the policeman and ended up spending the day in a small-town police station. Can you tell him the story?

SHMIRAS HALASHON

THE HALACHAH

Even though you are including yourself among the guilty parties in a story, you are not allowed to tell it if it will cast others in a negative light. The cousins may not want others to know that they behaved irresponsibly. Perhaps the story will get back to their children and reduce the parents' stature in their eyes.

Reviewed by Rabbi Moshe Mordechai Lowy, shlita. For discussion only; pls consult a rav. From Chofetz Chaim Heritage Foundation's Shabbos Menu [email protected].

It wasn't exactly terrible, but it wasn't exactly a shining moment. It definitely was, however, the makings of a great story. If you and some friends engage in a "misadventure," can you tell the story? Because you're including yourself as one of the "guilty parties," you obviously don't feel that the story is really damaging. But what about the others?

THE DILEMMA

Your newly-licensed son wants to drive a group of friends to an out-of-town wedding. Remembering back to your younger years, you recall a similar situation in which you and two cousins drove through the night at warp speed, got pulled over, didn't have the registration to show the policeman and ended up spending the day in a small-town police station. Can you tell him the story?

SHMIRAS HALASHON

THE HALACHAH

Even though you are including yourself among the guilty parties in a story, you are not allowed to tell it if it will cast others in a negative light. The cousins may not want others to know that they behaved irresponsibly. Perhaps the story will get back to their children and reduce the parents' stature in their eyes.

Reviewed by Rabbi Moshe Mordechai Lowy, shlita. For discussion only; pls consult a rav. From Chofetz Chaim Heritage Foundation's Shabbos Menu [email protected].

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