Now to our minds in this age, and in America, it's an extremely remote idea. It seems like an abstraction which seems very impractical to our Brooklyn minds or to our Los Angeles minds, or wherever you are today. Even the frummest people today, we're very distant from such an ideal of striving to emulate Hakadosh Baruch Hu, to resemble Him.
After all, we have such a hazy picture of Hakadosh Baruch Hu. He’s a word in the siddur, a vague idea. Like it states in the Navi Yermiyahu, ם∆יהƒפ¿ּב הָּ ַ̇‡ בֹרוָ ̃ – You are near in their mouths, ם∆יה≈ ֹ̇יו¿לƒּכƒמ ֹ̃חוָר¿ו – but You’re far away from their insides, from their minds (12:2). Unfortunately, we have to admit that we frum people are quite remiss in thinking about Hakadosh Baruch Hu. You can test yourself: During the day, today, how many times did you stop to meditate on Hashem? I’m sorry to say, probably not much.
And so we have a job ahead of us because we have to live up to that ideal, that national function that our forefathers accepted upon themselves when they stood at the Yam Suf and they said together, “ּהו≈ו¿נַ‡¿ו יƒל≈ ̃ ה∆ז! We’re so full of gratitude to You Hashem that we take upon ourselves to forever make Your Name beautiful and glorious.”
Part III. Changing Ourselves
The Irishman Plus
And so we begin to understand now how vital, how urgent, is the function of transforming our personality by emulating the perfect ways of Hashem. Of course, you have to do it anyhow if you want to be successful in the world; even an Irishman must try and change his character if he wants to live successfully. An Irishman, if he doesn’t want his children and his neighbors to detest him, if he wants to keep his job and keep his wife, he’s going to have to find ways and means of improving his character.
But we’re not talking about that now. It’s that too but it’s much more than that; it’s a matter of bein adam la’Makom too. Because for the Am Yisroel perfecting our character means not only keeping a wife or a job; it’s keeping an oath – we’re fulfilling the oath we made to Hashem by Kriyas Yam Suf. We made a promise to You that all our lives we’ll work on this project of imitating You!
And that’s why the subject of transformation of character among Jews is one of the major forms of avodas Hashem. It’s because by becoming a me’ein of the middos of Hakadosh Baruch Hu, that’s the best way, the most virtuous way, of ּהו≈ו¿נַ‡¿ו; of making Hashem great and beautiful.
Synagogue Singing
So here’s a man who comes to shul for Shachris to sing Hashem’s praises. He’s holding his gartel and he’s saying Az Yashir, b’kol rom, out loud. He’s shaking and he’s praising Hashem: “ּהו≈ו¿נַ‡¿ו יƒל≈ ̃ ה∆ז – This is my G-d and I will beautify Him.” And he says it with a special niggun too. He’s singing the words.
And that’s how it should be! It doesn’t say רָׁ ̆ זָ‡ הׁ∆ ֹ̆מ. Chazal say: רַמ ¡‡∆נ ‡ֹל רָׁ ̆ – It doesn’t say they sang; ירׁƒ ָ̆י ‡ָּל∆‡ – it says ‘They’re going to sing’. You saved us on that day from destruction and it was such an exhilarating experience that we’ll never stop singing about it.
ּהו≈ו¿נַ‡¿ו יƒל≈ ̃ ה∆ז – We promise we’re going to sing Your praises forever. And this man in the shul, he’s doing that. Excellent!
But what happens after davening, that’s the question. He comes home and he’s frustrated. “Where’s my breakfast?!” He’s impatient. He’s angry. Oooh! That man is not really praising Hashem. Of course he is, but it’s not enough. Because he shouldn’t forget about what Abba Shaul told us. You know how you really praise Hashem? You know how you’ll really aggrandize Him? When you come home from the shul and you emulate Him. When all day long, in all of your interactions with other people, you’re trying to be like Him. That’s what you were saying in shul anyhow – “This is my Keil and I will make Him great by means of imitating His ways.”
Imitating Patience
So this man, on the way home from shul he’s thinking, “What do I know about Hashem? Well, I know He’s an Erech Apayim.” At least that everybody remembers. Some people say those words in Tachanun: םƒיַּפַ‡¿ך∆ר∆‡ – He’s long patient.
Patience is one of the great middos of Hakadosh Baruch Hu. How do I know that? Because we’re here. If He wasn’t patient with us, we wouldn’t be around here anymore. He’s always giving us another chance, and another chance and another chance. “Oh!,” he thinks. “That’s something I can think about. He’s ך∆ר∆‡ םƒיַּפַ‡ and that means I have to be םƒיַּפַ‡¿ך∆ר∆‡ too. Just like Hashem is patient with people, I’ll try to be patient with people too.”
Oh! That’s ּהו≈ו¿נַ‡¿ו – I’m praising Him; that’s the greatest praise of Hashem. Merely saying praises, that’s cheap – could be they’re just words flowing out of your mouth that don’t mean anything. But imitating, that’s a real praise, that’s a real compliment – it’s worth all the words in the world.
Patience in Marriage
So here’s a man who gets married and he was expecting that she would be only sugar and spice. But now he finds out that it’s not so. She’s bothersome sometimes. Let’s say she talks a lot. She’s a woman; she wants to talk. And so he reminds himself of the One Who he’s expected to resemble and he trains himself to be patient. He’s quiet. He listens. He smiles.
A wife too has to be patient with her husband. Sometimes he’s stubborn. She doesn’t realize that all husbands are stubborn so she’s looking at him and she's thinking “What am I going to do with him? He’s like a stubborn bull. He’s really on my nerves.”
And then she reminds herself, “Ani v’Hu – I’m going to be like Hashem. I’ll bite my tongue. I’m going to keep my mouth closed and be patient. And I’ll cook him a tasty supper anyhow.”
Patience All Around
It’s a big job. You’ll practice being patient with everybody. If you’re a rebbe of talmidim and one talmid is fresh and you have a yetzer hara, you want to throw him out; no, be patient. If you have a tough customer in the store – he’s coming in the door and you know he’s a crabby fellow – you remind yourself, “Didn’t Rabbi Miller say something about this, about emulating Hashem by practicing patience.” And then do it. Do it.
You know, people always call me up about children. A child refuses to listen. So a parent loses patience and sometimes he breaks off his influence on the child. I say to them, “Practice being patient. You also don’t listen sometimes and Hashem is patient with you. So be like Him. Don’t give up. Keep on talking to the child. He’s a human being. It makes an impression on him. Persist and sooner or later, there are going to be some results. Even the toughest customer, talk to him again and again. Give him a caress on his face while you’ll talk to him. He’ll listen a little bit to you. Maybe the next time something more will get in and sooner or later, your words will penetrate into his heart.”
Thirteen Big Mesichtos
Now, I said Erech Apayim, but that’s just one example. It’s a big subject, to study the Ways of Hashem. And you have to study it because without learning you won’t know. You can't emulate just from your own imagination without knowing what they are. If you don’t look at the Torah, then you wouldn’t know.
You remember when Moshe Rabbeinu asked Hashem, ָיך∆כָר¿ּ„ ̇∆‡ ‡ָנ יƒנ≈‡¿רַה – Please show me Your Ways, and Hashem passed by and He called out thirteen attributes. Thirteen attributes Hakadosh Baruch Hu announced. Erech apayim, that’s the fourth one on the list, but there’s more there. Hashem, Keil, Rachum, Chanun, Rav Chesed, and so on.
So now you say it's written in the Chumash; so it's a simple matter to go ahead and do it. Well, in the Chumash it's written in one place ר∆ׁ ֲ̆‡ַּכ ָּ ̇¿חַבָז¿ו ָיך∆ ̇ƒיוƒˆ – you should slaughter like I commanded you. Could you be a shochet on the stance of knowing that passuk? Of course not. There's a whole perek in Mesichta Chullin, hakol shochtin, you have to study. And even if you know Mesichta Chullin, you can't be a shochet by any means. You have to know also Yoreh Deah. You have to know hilchos shechitah.
And so if there are thirteen middos – and there’s more in other places – so there’s a lot to study to emulate the Ways of Hakadosh Baruch Hu. When I was in Slabodka so Rav Avraham Grodzinski who was the menahel there spoke an entire winter on the thirteen middos and he spoke an hour and a half each session. And don't think he exhausted the subject. It was just so we should get a musag, some idea, but actually it's thirteen mesichtos.
The Anveihu Curriculum
And once you begin seeing His Ways you must have a plan; how am I going to put them into practice, when and how to apply them. There are eitzos. There are schemes. There are strategies. There are tricks to make it easier. You might have to find teachers. There are many seforim – in English too – that will teach you. Tomer Devorah, Cheshbon Hanefesh, Orchos Tzaddikim; so many.
I remember in Slabodka Yeshiva we learned these seforim. In the Mirrer Yeshiva in Europe, many learned these seforim. Every day there was a half hour of mussar in those yeshivas. And the mussar seforim were put on the table and each student chose one according to his interest. And among those seforim was a Tomer Devorah, a sefer that deals with this subject in detail. Generations and generations of young idealistic men studied these seforim and to some extent they profited; some more, some less, but they all profited.
And today they have them in English too. There’s no question everybody would profit if this was incorporated in the curriculum of yeshivas and Bais Yaakovs today. No question about it. And if you already left the yeshiva surely you have to incorporate this study into your life. That’s what our shevuah requires us to become. It takes some time, some practice and effort, but that’s included in what we undertook to fulfill.
Benjamin’s Biography
It’s a good idea if you’ll make a plan, a schedule for this program, so it shouldn’t be haphazard. You know, there was a certain gentile, Benjamin Franklin, who did that. Now, Benjamin Franklin wasn't a tzaddik, no; make no mistake about it. I know his biography; he was an immoral person. But in a certain area of his life, we can use him as an example because he spent a great deal of time thinking about himself – at least he claims he did. He made a calendar and on the calendar he put certain attitudes that he wanted to work on. Patience, humility, guarding his speech, other things.
Now, Benjamin Franklin wasn’t trying to emulate Hashem; no, he wasn’t thinking about that. Only that he wanted to live successfully and so he identified thirteen virtues that he thought would help him succeed as a statesman, to be popular. And so he set up a system of working on one per week – he had a calendar worked out according to the year and four times a year he repeated it. By the end of the year he repeated all thirteen qualities of character four times. It was the thirteen virtues; thirteen weeks, and he repeated it four times each year, thinking and trying to train himself in these virtues.
So you see there were sensible people, even goyim, lehavdil, who worked on themselves and they gained prudence; they gained an attitude of how to deal with people successfully.
Better Than Benjamin
But that’s nothing yet. If you hear a story like that al achas kamah v’kamah it obligates you a thousand times more because a Torah Jew stands to gain much more than Benjamin Franklin if he puts time away for such a project. A Jew who follows this way in life will grow infinitely greater than even the best gentile because he’s not merely preparing for living successfully in this world, for getting along with others. He’s doing infinitely more than that because he’s fulfilling this great shevuah that our forefathers made at Har Sinai, of ּהו≈ו¿נַ‡¿ו יƒל≈ ̃ ה∆ז – this is my Hashem and I’m going to glorify Him.
It’s a very important oath and the Jewish people throughout their history attempt to fulfill it. “We’re alive only because of You Hashem and we promise that we’ll spend our days making You great in this world.” And so we’ll sing Your praises all the time!
ּו„ֹהו יוָ ֹ̇ילוƒלֲﬠ יםּƒמַﬠָבּיעוƒ„ֹהו ֹמוׁ¿ ּ̆ƒבּו‡¿רƒ ̃ םּׁ≈ ַ̆הַל – We try to advertise Hashem to ourselves and to everybody. We teach Hashem to our little children. Children should know Hashem is giving them bread. He’s giving them ice cream. He’s giving them candy. “Hashem gave you the candy,” we tell our children. We have to tell ourselves too!
But most importantly, we can never lose sight of what Abba Shaul taught us. We swore on that day, “Ani v’Hu! We are going to resemble You!” That’s the greatest praise of Hashem! That we’ll try, as much as humanly possible, to imitate His perfect qualities and be like Him.
Have A Wonderful Shabbos
Let’s Get Practical
Fulfilling The Oath of Salvation
When our people were saved from certain ruination at Yam Suf, we sang enthusiastically. And we accepted an oath of “Anveihu – I shall glorify Him.” We glorify Him by praising Him at all times to everyone who will listen, but especially to ourselves. This week I will choose one piece of pesukei dezimrah to say it slowly, with the intention of fulfilling this oath.
And because the highest form of v’anveihu is to imitate Hashem’s Ways, this week I will bli neder dedicate two minutes each day to studying about one of Hashem’s Ways and thinking and planning how I can emulate Him in my life.
This week’s booklet is based on tapes: 234 - Emulating Him | 389 - Perfection in Marriage, Emulating Hashem | 453 - Song At the Sea | 504 - Pesach XIII 656 - Middos: Emulating Hashem
