10. One Motzei Shabbos, after Reb Avraham Genichovsky zt'l returned home from shul, a neighbor, who didn’t cover her hair, came to ask him advice about some important matter. This woman was an almanah, so after taking counsel, she asked Reb Avraham if she could stay to hear havdalah. Reb Avraham (who had sterling middos, and especially after hearing that she was a widow) immediately replied, "Of course, you can stay for havdalah."
The family wondered how Reb Avraham would say havdalah. The neighbor didn't cover her hair, so it was forbidden to say havdalah in front of her. The family thought, "Perhaps he will turn his face away from her? But that might embarrass her." When the rav was about to pick up his becher for havdalah, he said out loud, "Now, everyone, let's face towards the Kosel Maaravi." This solved the problem because now he wasn't facing her when he said havdalah. The woman wasn’t embarrassed because she thought the rav always says havdalah in the manner people say Shemonah Esrei, facing the place of the Beis HaMikdash.
A person's greatness is measured according to the extent to which he helps others. The following is a hint at this concept: Moshe Rabbeinu said to Hashem (Devarim 3:24) ָגָּדְלְך אֶת ָע ַבְדְּך אֶת לְה ַרְאוֹת ָהַח ִלּוֹת אַת ָּה, "You have begun to show Your servant Your greatness". Rashi writes, טובך מדת זו – ָגָּדְלְך אֶת, "Your greatness is Your goodness." We can say that the same applies to people. They are called "great" when they help others. A kind person is truly a great person.
There is a lesson repeated in the name of the Apter Rav zt'l (Yalkut Ohev Yisrael) and in the name of the Ruzhiner zt'l (Irin Kadishin). It states in this week's parashah (13:2) פ ֶּטֶר בְּכוֹר כָל לִי ׁק ַדֶּש הוּא לִי וּב ַבְּהֵמָה בָּאָדָם יִשְׂרָאֵל בִּבְנֵי רֶחֶם כָּל, "Sanctify to Me every firstborn, the first issue of every womb among Bnei Yisrael, of man and beast, is Mine." לִי ׁק ַדֶּש, if a person wants to be kadosh for Hashem, בְּכוֹר כָל consider everyone to be greater than you. כָּל פ ֶּטֶר, the first thing you should do is יִשְׂרָאֵל בִּבְנֵי רֶחֶם, have rachmanus on Bnei Yisrael. Perhaps you will say בָּאָדָם וּב ַבְּהֵמָה, that he isn't a person, just an animal [so why should I help him?] הוּא לִי, Hashem says that that is for Him to determine. Your mission is to have rachmanus on all Yidden.
It states (Shemos 2:6) וְה ִנֵּה ה ַיֶּלֶד אֶת וַת ִּרְא ֵהוּ וַתִּפְת ַּח עָלָיו וַתַּח ְמֹל בֹּכֶה נַעַר, "She opened [the teivah] and saw the child. Behold, a youth was crying. She took pity on him... "The pasuk states both ה ַיֶּלֶד and נַעַר. How can both terms describe the same child, a יֶּלֶד is a younger child than a נַעַר? The meforshim ask this question (see Rashi).
Yalkut Shimoni and the Baal HaTurim answer that ה ַיֶּלֶד refers to Moshe, and the נַעַר בֹּכֶה refers to Aharon. Aharon (Moshe's brother) stood near Moshe's teivah to see what would happen to him, and he was crying from concern and worry. Basya said, זֶה הָע ִבְרִים מ ִיַּלְדֵי. She was saying, "If a brother cares so much for his younger brother until he cries for him, I know they are Jewish children." For this is the essence of a Yid, to be concerned for the welfare of his brothers.
It states (12:22) עַד בֵּיתוֹ מִפ ֶּתַח אִישׁ ת ֵ צְ אוּ לֹא וְאַת ֶּם בֹּקֶר, "No man shall leave the entrance of his house until morning." If they leave their homes, they may be punished together with the Mitzrim when they were smitten with makas Bechoros. Rashi explains, "This tells us that after the angel had permission to damage, it doesn't differentiate between a tzaddik and a rasha."
Rebbe Shlome Zvhiller zt'l asks that if the angel doesn't differentiate between a tzaddik and a rasha, then it also won't differentiate between a first-born Mitzri or a second or third born. Why did those Mitzrim (who were born second or third, etc.) survive, and only the first-borns died?
Rebbe Shlomke replied that it is because they had the mitzvah of tzedakah and vatranus. Just before the makah, the Yidden went to them and asked to borrow clothes and utensils, and they obliged. The merit of their kindness, generosity, and vatranus granted them life and protected them from death.
We discover from this that even resha'im will be granted life and protection when they practice chesed and vatranus.
It states (13:16) מִמ ִּצְר ָיִם 'ה הוֹצִיא ָנוּ יָד בְּחֹזֶק כִּי, "for with a strong hand Hashem removed us from Mitzrayim." Tzaddikim explain that יָד בְּחֹזֶק indicates that people gave chizuk (בְּחֹזֶק יָד) to one another. In this merit, מִמ ִּצְר ָיִם 'ה הוֹצִיא ָנוּ, Hashem took us out of Mitzrayim.
Tana d'Bei Eliyahu (Rabba ch.23) tells us that in Mitzrayim, the Yidden would gather, and "They would sit together until they became אחת אגודה one group, and they made a bond together that they would perform gemilus chasadim with one another." In the merit of their unity and kindness, we were redeemed from Mitzrayim.
