Doubts
Another way to encourage and improve ourselves in changing our ways is to cast away the doubt that prevents us from following through with our resolutions. When one is sure of himself and knows this is what he must do, he finds the strength and the willpower to do it. When one isn't sure, it is harder to overcome the great challenge of "change."
In parashas Shemos, Pharaoh said ירבה פן, and Hashem said ירבה כן (see 1:12). The Imrei Chaim of Vizhnitz zt'l said that פן means doubts, perhaps. כן means you are definite. Pharaoh said ירבה פן, let there be many doubts among the Jewish nation. Let them not have clarity on what they should do. Hashem replies, ירבה כן, that there should be certainty among the Jewish people.
Also, in parashas Shemos, Pharaoh said (5:7) לעם תבן לתת תאספון לא, "You shall not continue to give stubble to the people to make the bricks." There is an extra ף"אל in תאספון. Rebbe Dovid'l Lelover zt'l explains that תאספון לא means that Pharaoh forbade them from gathering together. The Midrashim tell that the Jewish nation would gather every Shabbos to strengthen their emunah and their belief that Hashem would redeem them. Probably, at these gatherings, they also reminded themselves that they are a holy nation, descendants of the holy Avos and Imahos. And they probably spoke about and set guidelines, so they don't become like the goyim by emulating their language, clothes, names, etc.
Pharaoh was frightened by these gatherings, so he said תאספון לא, "No more gatherings!" He preferred that the nation shouldn’t have clarity on who they are, what will be in the future, and what they should do.
Action occurs when there is certainty. When there is confusion and uncertainty, people often become placid and inactive. For example, why do people eat unhealthy foods? It is often because when they eat it, they think it won't harm them this time and that it won't affect their avodas Hashem this time. If they knew for certain that it would harm them, they would refrain.
During times in history when there was forced conversion, r'l, which Yidden were moser nefesh? Those who were steadfast with their emunah.
This also occurred to the Egyptians in Mitzrayim. They witnessed many makos, yet they didn’t believe it was from Hashem! By makas barad, Hashem instructed them how to save themselves, and yet not everyone took the warning seriously (see 9:20). This is because they weren't sure. And when there are doubts, people are less likely to act.
The Mesilas Yesharim (ch.1) writes, יסוד אצל ויתאמת שיתברר הוא התמימה העבודה ושרש החסידות בעולמו חובתו מה האדם, "The foundation and the root of the true service is that it should be clarified and true to the person what is his obligation in the world."
It must be clear to the person. He should know clearly what he must do in Hashem's service, and then he will do it. As long as there are doubts, he will likely not take the plunge and make decisions. Likely, he won't take action.
Making Decisions
Baruch Hashem, as a rule, most of us don't have doubts. We believe in Hashem with all our heart and soul, and we believe in the Torah with all the halachos and lessons. However, moments of doubt do arise in life. Not everything is clearly stated in Shulchan Aruch, and not every question can be asked to one's Rav. There are situations in life in which one has to figure out what to do and how to proceed. How does one make a decision? How does one choose between two or more options? As we wrote above, if he were certain about what he needed to do, he would do it no matter how hard it was. But when there are doubts, how does one choose from all the options? How does one know that he chose wisely?
We will bring some tips:
- The Beis Aharon teaches, אסורים חפציך, "What you desire is forbidden." If you have a burning desire to eat something or do something, you should think it through well because chances are, it is not the right thing to do. Your passionate desire is likely the yetzer hara.
- In Kedushah of Keser, it states מקום איה יאמרו ברוך לעומתם ...כבודו. This is a hint to when you want to know כבודו מקום איה, what is the right way to go, and what should you do, the answer is לעומתם, see where you have obstacles and difficulties. That is a sign that this is the path that you should take.
- Another counsel is to write down both options and review them for three days.
- There is also a concept that when you are unsure about what you should do, the first thought that comes to your mind is the yetzer tov. The second thought is the yetzer hara.
