8. Rashi (10:21) writes that one could actually touch the darkness of Choshech. Rashi writes, ומכופל כפול שהיה ממש בו שהיה עד ועב, "It was doubled and quadrupled and thick until it had substance." This is the meaning of the words ׁ ֶ ךְחֹש ׁוְיָמֵש. The darkness was so thick, it had a ממשות, substance. Yalkut Shimoni says that the thickness of the darkness of makas Choshech was the thickness of a dinar coin. There is a popular vort that this hints that money is often the cause of the darkness, until אָח ִיו אֶת אִישׁ ר ָאוּ לֹא, "A person didn't see his brother." This is because when a person's primary focus is his desire for money and wealth, he cannot hear the cries and requests of the poor and needy. He acts like he doesn't see them.
In contrast (10:23) בְּמוֹש ְׁבֹתָם אוֹר ה ָיָה יִשְׂרָאֵל בְּנֵי וּלְכָל, "For all Bnei Yisrael there was light in their dwellings." This means that the way of Bnei Yisrael is to see their fellow man, and try to help in any way they can (see Chofetz Chaim, Shaar HaTevunah, ch.5).
It is important to consider your fellow man as righteous and essential. With that thought in mind, you will want to help him. Although everyone has faults, consider how a person views himself. Everyone knows his own faults, yet he judges himself favorably, l'kaf zechus. One might even consider himself to be a tzaddik; he sometimes believes there is no one greater in the world than him. This is despite all his faults, because he focuses on his good points. This is how we should view our fellow man. This is how to perform the mitzvah of כמוך לרעך ואהבת, to love our fellow man like yourself.
Reb Pinchas of Koritz zt'l (Imrei Pinchas, ט"ש בהעלתך) says that every Yid possesses a holiness and a uniqueness that no one else in the world has. When we think about this, we are inspired to help our fellow man, for his importance is enormous.
Reb Elya Lopian zt'l related that in the city of Anipoli, two neighbors were locked in dispute for decades. One of them became ill, and he requested that they bring the neighbor to him, because he didn't want to die in the midst of a machlokes. The neighbor was very happy when he heard about the request. Finally, after years of dispute, there would be peace. Standing at the bedside of the ill person, they both cried. They knew that this was the last time they would meet until the coming of Moshiach. The ill person asked his neighbor to come closer to him, as he wanted to kiss him. The neighbor lowered his head, and then he suddenly shouted in pain. The dying person bit off his ear! The ill person smiled and said that after taking revenge, he could die in peace.
Reb Elya Lopian repeated this story to show the dreadfulness and depth of bad middos. Even on his deathbed, his only desire was to take revenge.
9. Reb Asher Fruend zt'l appointed a yungerman to care for an unwell person. After a while, this yungerman told Reb Asher that he couldn't do it anymore. It was too hard for him. Reb Asher replied, "You need a tikun, and he is your korban." In other words, the yungerman thought he was helping the ill person. Actually, it was the other way around. The ill person was helping him. The yungerman needed a rectification, and the ill person, whom he served, helped him attain his perfection.
One should always speak sweetly, kindly, and softly, as it states (Mishlei 15:1) יָשִׁיב רַּ ךְ מַע ֲנֶה חֵמָה, "A gentle reply turns away wrath." יֶחֱרַץ לֹא, don't be sharp with your tongue, rather לֶב – כֶּ, your mouth should be kind as your heart is kind.
This lesson is related to the makah of Choshech. Regarding Choshech, it states (10:23) אָח ִיו אֶת אִישׁ ר ָאוּ לֹא, "A person didn't see his brother." The Chidushei HaRim zt'l explains that the greatest darkness is when it is so dark that one doesn't see his fellow man. This is when one is only interested in himself and doesn't care about helping others.
The pasuk then writes, מִתַּחְת ָּיו אִישׁ ק ָמוּ וְלֹא, "no one rose from his place". The Chidushei HaRim explains that this means that one doesn't receive aid from heaven. Because there is a rule: When one helps others, Heaven helps him. When one doesn't help others, מִתַּחְת ָּיו אִישׁ ק ָמוּ וְלֹא, he can't get up. He doesn't receive the salvations he needs.
