But the Medrash goes on and adds something; it tells us that there was more to the conversation: וְ אִ ם לַ או – “And if not,” Avraham said to the Bnei Cheis, “if you’re not able to accomplish that for me, לִ י עִ לַ וֵ יה צַ לו – thenat least pray for me about my problem.” That’s another intention our Sages saw in Avraham’s words; because we find elsewhere that פגע means prayer; like when Hashem told the navi, י ע בִ פְ גַ וְאַ ל תִ – “Don’t plead with Me.” (Yirmiyahu 7:16). And so here too Avraham said לִ י פִ גְ עו ו – “You people should pray for me.”
Now, we have to understand what’s being said here because it’s not just a story about how Avraham Avinu purchased a field; it’s intended as a model for us to follow. After all, דוֹ ל הָ עוֹ לָ ם אַ בְ רָ הָ ם ג הָ יָ ה – Avraham was considered the greatest of his generation (Midrash Mishlei 9:1). Even the gentiles recognized him. The townspeople of Cheis said to Avraham, נְשִׂ יא אֱל קִים אַתָּ בְתוֹכֵנו – “You are a prince of Elokim in our midst” (Bereishis 23:6). But nasi means more than prince. It means one who’s elevated. Everybody looked up to Avraham Avinu as a very important personality in the land, as a model for proper living; his ways of thinking and acting were always a teaching.
A Model For Us
That’s why the Torah goes out of its way to dilate on Avraham’s negotiations and acquisition of the Mearas Hamachpeilah. Eighteen pessukim is a lot of real estate in the Torah! The answer is that it’s intended as a model of perfect behavior. Avraham’s humility, his generosity, his dignity of conduct, are established forever as an important lesson in proper behavior. And so if the Chachomim are telling us that Avraham said two things to the Bnei Cheis – number one, u’figu li, “approach Efron for me”, and number two, “If not, u’figu li, then pray for me” – if Avraham spoke that way then that's the way every person is expected to follow.
What’s the lesson? When there’s something that has to be done for someone else there are always two attitudes to keep in mind. Number one, the first thing when you’re asked to do a favor for a fellow man – even if you’re not asked but you see that someone needs something – the first thing is you should attempt with your abilities, with all your agency, to succeed. Don’t be apathetic and lazy. You might give me your brachah, your prayers, but don't rely on tefillah alone. Be the sarsur, the middleman, to make it happen. “Do whatever you can,” Avraham said to the Bnei Cheis, “that Efron should consent.”
Now of course you might also want to give me your best wishes. You might wish me luck. But that's not enough. First you have to try to do your best. That's what it’s saying. Number one, לִ י פִ גְ עו ו. “Urge him. Do something to help me out. Before you give me your good wishes and your prayers, go ahead and do l’maaseh for me. Show me that you mean business by actually doing the best you could.”
Praying in Truth
That’s included in the important principle of calling out to Hashem in truth. Because when Dovid Hamelech tells us that קָרוֹב ה' לְכָל קֹרְ אָיו – Hashem is close to all those who call out to Him, he adds an amendment: בֶאֱמֶת לְכֹל אֲשֶׁר יִקְרָאֻהו – To those who call out to Him in truth (Tehillim 145:18). That’s a big principle: your prayers have to be backed up by your behavior – that’s called ‘calling out in truth’.
It’s like the man who says ה ' וְ נֵ רָ פֵ א רְ פָ אֵ נ ו – Hashem heal me. Every day, a few times a day, he’s crying out to Hashem for good health. Meanwhile, look at him. His wife prepares a good healthy supper for him but he stops off at a store on the way home and he eats garbage. He's sitting down and eating, let’s say, cake and soda instead of nourishing food. Or he sits up late at night listening to the radio or whatever it is and munching on peanuts, instead of going to sleep on time.
So Hashem says, “You don't mean business. You're asking Me to heal you? But why don't you heal yourself? You're not doing anything for yourself and so you’re not calling out to Me in truth.”
