For this reason, it is incumbent upon us to utilize this opportunity of the experience to daven for others in this situation. We find that when Sarah Imeinu became expectant, all other barren women were likewise helped. Why is this? Because once the conduit for the yeshuah was opened, it was opened for everyone. Thus, we find that when a person is in need of a yeshuah, it is a marvelous opportunity to daven for another person.
Two Levels in Davening for Others
But the truth is that even in davening for others, there are various levels. One way to do it is as a segulah; to intentionally daven for others so that he will merit a yeshuah, but the more altruistic way is to daven for others solely for them to merit a yeshuah.
However, from a letter by Rav Akiva Eiger, we learn that even davening on the lower level can be effective in producing a yeshuah. He writes, “I see from your letter that you’re not in the best of health, and I too, sadly, find myself in this situation, and I advise you, if it’s not too difficult, to keep me in mind in your tefillos, and thus it will be fulfilled ‘one who davens for another person will be answered first.’”
Really Meaning It
The commentaries on the Shelah HaKadosh teach us that, ideally, כל חבירו בעד המתפלל means that he shouldn’t think about himself at all. But one must know that there are levels in this. As we have seen in the Tiferes Shlomo, this is not a game... it is dependent upon the heart, and the better one does in this regard, the better the quality of his tefillah will be.
One must understand that the more he takes himself out of the picture, the more his tefillah will be effective. One may say, “I know myself, and I know that I will think about my own needs.” B’seder. But he should at least try to do his best to think about others as much as possible. A person should never give up (the perfect is the enemy of the good). He shouldn’t say, “Because I know that it can benefit me, I will no longer merit the benefit of חבירו.” בעד המתפלל כל No. It’s not “yes or no.” It depends on the heart... meaning that one should care about another person.
