I know of a Moroccan Jew whose wife was the “boss in the house” and he was super “mush”. His friends used to criticize him for this. But he continued being a “piece of sugar” and his children went off the Derech, Rachmana Litzlan. R' Avigdor Miller Zatzal could be quite strong and he missed Chasuna’s all the time - but look what became of him!
In Novardok they took everyone apart. One person was told to be nicer and the other was told be tougher. Every case is different. Many people call me when they have problems with their children. They become depressed and anxious and worried. I need to tell them to have less Shaychus with their kids, and have more Bitachon and less love and warmth and caring. This would save them and their children. I once knew a Yungerman who was going crazy since his wife dominated him and he became like a second mother, being stuck at home with the children. I gave him a crash course in being “Mr. Tough Guy” instead of being soft butter.
