Rav Shimshon would often speak of mesirus nefesh. He explained that the word nefesh bears two meanings: it means “life,” and it also refers to a person’s will, his desire. (This we see from the fact that Avraham Avinu, after the death of Sarah, addressed the people of Ches by saying: “If you are willing [nafshechem] to bury my dead from before me….”)
Accordingly, mesirus nefesh means to give up one’s will. What does that mean?
The following example brings out the point. A kollel man comes to the dentist’s office for an appointment, and since he knows it might be a long wait, he brings along a Gemara so he can learn in the meantime. While he is sitting there, he sees in front of him a stack of newspapers and various “kosher” magazines that catch his interest. He really wants to pick one up and read it. Who knows, he says to himself, maybe this issue has an article with some great idea that can help with parnassah…
In short, his nefesh – his inner will and desire – is set on reading an entertaining article right now. He is already raising his arm to reach out and pick up the interesting reading material, and suddenly he senses Hashem saying to him, so to speak: “No! Don’t look in anything but the Gemara!”
“But Hashem, I want to read the newspaper…”
“No!!”
A conflict develops. In the end, he “gives in.” He says, so to speak: “Hashem, I am in fear of You. You are Master over All. I have little children, and in one moment when a child is crossing the street, a tragedy could take place, chas v’shalom. Or something else could happen. I am willing to give up on what I want, and to do what You say. I won’t look at newspapers and magazines. I will only learn Gemara.”
This is mesirus nefesh. But it is not the mesirus nefesh of Malchus, because it reflects the following stance: there is me, and there is Hashem. He says like this while I say like that. Since I don’t have much choice, since I am worried about what might happen, I therefore give in to Him.
The mesirus nefesh of Malchus is something else. It is along the lines of, “the servant of a king is like a king.” When Hashem commands me to learn Gemara, then what is written there is like honey to me. Whereas the newspaper is like garbage to me, and who wants to eat garbage? Is garbage “interesting”? Right now, I might not sense so strongly that the reality is like this, but I will try to get there, because Hashem is the central point in my life, around which everything else revolves. This is Malchus.
