י ע ן לֹא הֶאֱמ נְתֶ ם בִ י לְ ה קְ דִ ישֵ נִי (Numbers 20:12). Hitting a rock with anger and saying: אָּנ וּעְּמִש י כ ריםִֹמַה Listen up, you rebels! is lacking in Eidelkeit. It is loaded with Din, not Rachamim. Chazal say that Hashem doesn’t associate His name with Din, only Rachamim. That’s why when Hashem created “light” it says that “Elokim” called the light “day”; but by darkness, “He” called it night [without mentioning Hashem’s name].
Hashem created the world with a mere utterance, and with the easiest letter to vocalize, as it says: בְּהִבָּרְָּאם (Genesis 2:4) Hashem created the world with the letter “Heh”. Hashem wants the world to feel His love, Eidelkeit, and softness: כְּ רַ חֵם ָאב עַל בָּנִ ים like a loving father.
In Order to Emulate Hashem, We Need to Always Act Refined and Be Loving and Soft
When Moshe hit the rock, it was an act of Din and therefore lacking in Kiddush Hashem, since Hashem isn’t really part of Din. And Moshe, Hashem’s Shali'ach messenger, can no longer be His representative. In general, we need to view Hashem’s world as a place of compassion and happiness, and we need to always be refined, loving, and soft, like it says: הַקֹל קוֹל יַעֲקֹב (Genesis 27:22) the gentle voice of Yaakov, to emulate Hashem.
Being tough and mean is not Hashem’s message to mankind. When we bring a Korban Pesach, we have a choice of either a tough goat or a gentle sheep. But even the goat is called: שֶ ה ִזִע ים a soft sheep-like animal. Being too tough can cause Dinim harshness in a person’s life, and indeed Moshe wasn’t allowed to enter Eretz Yisroel because of his tough stand.