I repeat the following story, in the words of the baal hamaaseh:
I spent over five years in a hospital, to be with my daughter, who required extensive medical care. Over this time, I got to know several bachurim who were patients of that hospital, and I began to notice an unfortunate pattern: When the family and the bachur weren't on guard, it was common that bachurim requiring an extended hospital stay would experience a spiritual descent.
Once, a bachur from a family I know was hospitalized with "the disease." I understood that he would be there for quite some time, so I approached his father and advised him to be cautious and not leave his son alone in the hospital. Someone should always be with him. This will protect the bachur from befriending people that could negatively affect him, and from seeing things he shouldn't, r'l. I also advised the father to arrange a chavrusah for his son, so that he shouldn't lose his connection with the Torah. I told him I was speaking from experience, based on what I know and have witnessed over the years I spent in the hospital.
The father accepted my advice, and said he would do so. Nevertheless, to be extra cautious, I called the bachur's rosh yeshiva, and I requested that the yeshiva send someone to the hospital to learn with the bachur. This was arranged. The yeshiva sent a yungerman to learn with the bachur. The yungerman would also test the bachur, according to the amount he was expected to know. In this manner, the bachur maintained his yiras Shamayim and his Torah.
During the bachur's hospital stay, his family made a chasunah for one of their other children. Obviously, at the time of the simchah, the family couldn't come to the hospital, so during that time, I took care of the bachur. I spent many nights with him, and I took him to the medical tests that he had to take. We also had many conversations, and I helped him in various ways.
With Hashem's immense chesed, the bachur recovered, and he made a seudas hadoyah. I was also invited to this thanksgiving celebration. The peak of the celebration was when the bachur made a siyum on masechta Bava Kama. He learned the entire masechta in the hospital.
The rosh yeshiva spoke at the seudah. He said, "Just as you invited me to this seudah, I am looking forward to an invitation to your vort," and he gave him a brachah that he should get engaged soon.
When the rosh yeshiva said this, I thought to myself, "I would such a bachur as my son-in-law." I knew the bachur very well, I knew his qualities. In particularly, I saw how strong he remained with his Yiddishkeit, in a trying environment, where many others fail.
But on the other hand, I knew this bachur’s medical history, and it concerned me.
After the meal, I walked home together with one of the mashgichim of the yeshiva. Our conversation was obviously about this bachur, and the mashgiach told me about the qualities of the bachur, which he observed in the yeshiva. He told me how well the bachur learns, and so on.
When I got home, my elder daughter noticed that I was emotional about something, and she asked me about that. I told her that I was thinking that this bachur might be a good shidduch for her. She said, "So, what's stopping you?"
I told her, "For my part, I am prepared to drink l'chayim, but it is up to you."
I spoke to the doctors at the hospital. They couldn’t give me all the details, due to privacy laws, but they gave me the basic general picture.
We checked into it well, made the necessary inquiries, and the shidduch was finalized. (There were many other signs from heaven that this shidduch was meant to be. Both mechutanim experienced this.)
See the wonderful hashgachah pratis. Specifically the challenging times that the bachur and the father of the young girl experienced, led up to a wonderful shidduch.
Furthermore, there is a rule: What you do for others, you do for yourself. This can be seen in this story. He made efforts to help this bachur maintain his yiras Shamayim, without knowing that he was really doing this for himself and his daughter.
