PARENTING POST
By Sarah Chana Radcliffe
Do you find they only listen when you raise your voice?
If family members only listen to you when you scream, follow this strategy: stop screaming. Yes, they will ignore you for the first little while. However, you have taught them to ignore you when you speak in a normal volume. They wait until you raise your voice before they bother to look up. But you must never raise your voice again! Instead, you will have to convey the seriousness of your words while you are speaking in that quiet, normal voice of yours. You can do this in different ways. You can go right up to the person you are speaking to, look them in the eye and - in your quiet tone - tell them what you want them to do. That’s usually quite effective. Or, standing at a normal distance, you can tell them what will happen if they fail to do what you are (quietly) asking them to do. This works if you always make sure to carry through. Or, you can tell them what will NOT happen unless they comply immediately, again ensuring that you are good for your word. Holding up a sign is another possibility for those old enough to read. Ringing a bell (gonging a gong or otherwise creating an attention-grabbling noise) can get everyone’s attention and once you have it, you can say what you want in your normal voice.
