As much as we have to work on influencing others, on publicizing halochos and influencing hundreds of thousands of Jews to follow the path of Torah and mitzvos, we have to not neglect focusing on our own inner struggles. Every time we fight against our instinct to indulge in worldly pleasures, it is very precious to Hashem.
R’ Zalman Zezmir, one of the foremost chassidim of the Alter Rebbe, once remarked: “What did I gain by being introduced to chassidus? Before I became a chosid, I used to think 10 machshovos zoros a day (probably somewhat different than our own, in any case . .). And after I began to learn chassidus, I was thinking only 9 times a day mach”z.
Perhaps you think”, he concluded, “that this is something minor? You are wrong! This one time of subjugating myself is very important to Hashem.
We are at the threshold of Ellul, and the new year is right around the corner. We all know that we have to change, but we can be discouraged or pessimistic. We can think that we are no longer able to apply ourselves to learning and davening the way that we are meant to. We may think that we are already “farfallen”, lost cases.
But R’ Hillel says to us: “Don’t fool yourself. Du bizt gezunt! Du kenst nit gein veil du ligst in ahavas hataanugim un in ahavas atzmoi. Lig nisht in ahavas hatanugim, un du vest zen vi du kenst gein!”
And once we start going and walking, we will continue, מחיל אל חיל, from strength to strength and from level to level, until יראה אל אלוקים בציון NOW!
L’chaim! May we each work harder on limiting our involvement and preoccupation with gashmyus and chumryus, by each in his own way taking a step back, and may the Eibishter in turn lift up the entire world from its’ immersion in darkness of golus, and replace it with the light of the guelah with the immediate revelation of Moshiach Tzidkeinu TUMYM!!!
Rabbi Akiva Wagner
