Ohr Torah
On The Spiral Staircase of Prayer
“Your clothing did not wear out from upon you, and your foot did not swell these 40 years” (Eikev 8:4).
It can sometimes be difficult to pray with fiery passion, particularly when one feels physically or emotionally drained. This heaviness occurs because man is composed of the four elements, and while fire, wind, and water are all somewhat light and movable, when the decidedly heavy and immovable element of earth becomes dominant, prayer can be all but impossible. The Baal Shem Tov suggests this was King David’s concern when he beseeched G‑d to not cast him aside “at a time of old age.” When I find myself unable to pray because my limbs have figuratively grown heavy like that of an old man, David implored, do not forsake me.
The solution is to pray with as much power as one can muster now, even when the passion is not yet there. Inspiration will soon follow. And when that passion wanes again, do not despair, because such ups and downs are signs of progress, not setbacks.
This concept is illustrated by a following parable from the Baal Shem Tov: One who is walking toward a great light at the top of a spiral staircase will inevitably lose sight of his or her goal as the path winds around and around. But every step, even those steps taken in darkness, brings the individual closer to the light at the top of the staircase. Similarly, fluctuating levels of love and fear of G‑d are typical signs of forward motion along the spiral staircase of prayer.
With this introduction we can understand the deeper meaning behind the verse in this week’s Torah portion: “Your clothing did not wear out from upon you, and your foot did not swell these 40 years” (Eikev 8:4). The verse describes a miracle that took place in the wilderness: the Clouds of Glory that surrounded the Jewish people laundered their clothes, and childrens’ clothing grew with the wearer, so there was never a need for new garments.
On a mystical level, the cloud represents darkness and an apparent inability to inspire oneself to pray. One may mistake such emotional “cloud cover” for a setback in one’s relationship with G‑d, but those apparent low points are in fact laundering our spiritual garments. Whatever lack of enthusiasm we feel now will soon be followed by a fiery passion. And when our passion reasserts itself, our “children will grow with their clothes”—our lackluster meditations, termed “children” due to their immaturity, will join the lofty ranks of our most impassioned prayers.
Par. 159
Translated by: Yechiel Krisch
Adapted from the teachings of the Mezritcher Maggid
