כחי ועצם ידי עשה לי את החיל הזה I was successful only as a result of my hard work..... (Parshas Eikev)
How strong is the drive to succeed? Does it color our personality till we are not recognizable to our families, or even ourselves? Overworking has smashed through our relationships like an out of control car in heavy traffic, causing havoc daily. What can we do? Our needs are so great...tuition... living expenses...
We have traded our time in for money, and this has hurt us badly. Real relationships are based on time, not money. But this is only one test. A deeper challenge that we encounter is realizing where our success comes from. A wealthy merchant sold trees by the boatload to a hostile country in old Europe. Prussia was a good customer, but now they were threatening heavy fines if R’ Itzik, the merchant, would not turn his boats around and leave the port...never to return.
Itzik headed to R’ Chaim Volozhin, the Gadol Hador for a brocha. He needed a salvation; otherwise, he would be wiped out! R’ Chaim assured him that all will be fine. The next day, the Prussian authorities reversed their decision, allowing the huge boats to dock. Due to instability in the lumber market, the price of wood went up 30%, and Itzik benefited immensely from the delay. Itzik headed back to the Volozhiner Rosh Yeshiva to thank him. it was a miracle! He had profited handsomely!
R Chaim offered words of gentle rebuke. Each day we earn money is a gift from G-d, but the miracle not always evident to us. We attribute our e gains to our business acumen. Due to our limited vision, we only recognize the out of the box occurrences as coming straight from Heaven. But in fact everything, every step we take is a miracle!
It would truly change our lives if we take the words of the Chovos HaLevovos (Shaar Habitachon) to heart and realize that success comes from Above and is predestined... Therefore, maybe we should work normal hours, not marathon 12- 17 hour days. If we take these courageous steps, everyone around us will be rewarded. We will create strong loving bonds with those closest to us, our spouses and children. Our spouses will feel truly loved and appreciated, and our children will grow up healthier – they will finally have the self-confidence and positive selfimage that only a close relationship with a parent can provide.
Ok, now that you have let Hashem take charge – go for that walk with your spouse and yes, take the extra 20 minutes to go somewhere beautiful with your children. Don’t forgot to throw a ball around with them, smelling Hashem’s proverbial roses. Summertime is the perfect time for this major life adjustment! Enjoy! But don’t forget to turn off the phone while you are there. Be strong, be different. Don’t lose these precious moments by answering a text message...live life with a passion. No one can take your place. Good Shabbos!
- RABBI YAKOV YOSEF SCHECHTER
