Question: I really wanted that new job. I was sure I was going to get it, and I believed it was the perfect step for my career and family. It bothers me that I didn't get the offer, and I can't see it's a good thing at all! I have been in a depressed mood ever since. My wife tells me to move on, but I can't get back to normal.
Answer: As explained in Chassidic thought, we can choose to view every situation as having merit or the reverse; it all depends on our perspective. It’s our natural tendency to want outside factors to change so we can feel better, but if our happiness and peace of mind depend on these external events, our emotional well-being will be fragile. Life will always present challenges; the key is how we choose to view and react to them.
A fundamental principle of our faith is that everything is from Hashem, everything is good, and nothing is by chance. The fact that we don't perceive an event as good doesn't mean it isn't. In fact, Chassidus teaches that it comes from a higher, more transcendent level of goodness. As the Alter Rebbe explains in Tanya, "'No evil descends from Above,' and everything is good, though it may not be understood as such because of its immense and abundant goodness."
Our beliefs can exist in two states: makif, an encompassing level, or penimiut, an inward level. When our beliefs are only makif, we understand a concept intellectually, but our feelings and actions may not align with our beliefs when we are faced with a real life challenge. A person who achieves a penimiut state, a 'penimi,' strives for spiritual integration, making their beliefs part of who they are.
The more our awareness of Hashem’s Divine Providence and goodness is internalized, the easier it is to act on our beliefs and move on. Depression blocks the channels for Divine blessings to enter our lives. On the other hand, "happiness breaks through barriers"; the happier we are, the better things will be. It is written, "happiness sweetens the judgments," removing both physical and spiritual blockages. The more our faith in Hashem’s goodness is internalized, the happier we will feel.
Sukkot is considered the source of joy for the entire year. By using your faith to tap into the joyful energy of Sukkot, you can carry its happiness with you for the coming year.
Aharon Schmidt, marriage & individual counseling: www.aharonschmidt.com.
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