PARENTING POST
By Sarah Chana Radcliffe
Yes, the way you do it is very good but when your spouse does it a different way...
Spouses merge their worlds in order to make a new world for their own family. In order to do this safely and lovingly, it’s important for spouses to recognize that their own ways of doing something (i.e. doing dishes, spending money, organizing time or space) are simply “ways of doing something.” They aren’t “the one and only way,” the “right” way or even the “best” way. Trying to find the best features of each way and using them to create new ways consisting of compromises and blends, is more caring and respectful than trying to impose one’s preferred way on one’s spouse.
Do your words seem to be falling on deaf ears? Should you try a little louder or a little harder to make your point?
Negative behavior on your part (like criticizing, complaining, lecturing or name-calling) will not produce positive behavior on your loved one’s part. Think about that before you express your disappointment or frustration.
