Question: Our shul has about 75 families. We have classes, community events and, until recently, everyone got along well. Two months ago, about 15 families decided to start a new shul. There were certain things they wanted done differently, etc., etc. This has led to a lot of arguments - especially as they are trying to get people to join their new shul. How can things like this happen and a person still be able to have Ahavat Yisrael.
Answer: We say in our prayers each day, “Hashem, how numerous are Your works...” Hashem has created myriads of plants, insects, animals, creatures of the water, inanimate objects, planets, stars, heavens and more. So too, there are billions of people, each person with a different look, thoughts, feelings and ideas. Thus, it is no wonder that we might not see eye to eye. Yet, from conflict can blossom a greater unity. Like a cut rope that is stronger where it has been rejoined and tied. So too, the opportunity to make peace is only relevant when there is opposition. When there is no opposition, there is no need to make peace.
What enables this unity? Something higher, more transcendent, than both individual sides. Two ministers may be in conflict, yet when they stand before the king they are in peace. Two brothers stop fighting and get along when their father takes them to play basketball. Or, the unifying factor can be a common goal that joins the opposing sides.
As Jews, we ultimately have one goal: to bring Moshiach. One of the primary ways this is accomplished is through Ahavat Yisrael. Our Sages teach that the Jewish people are likened to one body. Hatred and fighting damages the Jewish body. Understanding, love and a desire to help our fellow makes for a healthy Jewish body and brings goodness to the Jewish people.
It is acceptable to disagree with another person’s ideas. It is even acceptable to disagree with his or her actions. However, we must separate the actions from the person. By rejecting the other person, we harm the Jewish body and, ultimately, ourselves.
The final paragraph of the six orders of the Mishnah states: “Great is peace, for G-d found no other vessel for [His] blessings other than peace.” In other words, G-d’s blessings reside where there is peace. The Previous Rebbe explained that a Jew is likened to a letter in a Torah scroll. At times, the letter might be covered with dirt and need to be cleaned. Yet, under the dirt, the letter itself is always whole; the soul is always pristine and holy. Remembering what unites us enables us to have Ahavat Yisrael, even though we disagree.
Aharon Schmidt - For counseling and questions for this column: [email protected]
