This week’s Torah portion instructs everyone to take the first fruits, the bikurim, and offer them to the Kohanim in the Temple. “And you shall rejoice with all the goodness that G-d, your G-d, has given you and your household” (Deut. 26:11).
Why do people need to be instructed to rejoice and be happy? After all, they finally get to reap what they sowed! They planted a tiny seed, waited and watered while the seed sprouted, waited and watered while the sprout grew, eventually becoming a tree, and then waited and watered until finally the tree bore fruit! At this point, the farmers should be bursting with excitement. Why does the Torah command them to be happy?
While the farmers may start off happy and excited to be reaping what they worked so hard for and bringing the first fruits to the Kohanim, our Sages tell us that once they see what everyone else is bringing, potentially bigger or more fruit, a better basket, etc., then their happiness is fleeting and can instead be replaced with jealousy. When we look at ourselves, our families, our homes, and our possessions, often times we are really satisfied with what we have. That is until we look to see what our neighbours and friends have.
We are happy with our Honda until our friend gets a Lexus. The friend’s Lexus does not change the Honda, however our perception of the Honda changes. Our happiness resides and is completely dependent on our perception. And the beautiful thing about perception is that it is in our control. I can control how I perceive my surroundings. I can choose what I focus on: the friend’s more expensive car or my working car. What I choose to put my energy into and focus on will determine how I see things, and my attitude which in turn will determine my state of mind: will I be happy or jealous? Will I focus on all the blessings in my life or the things I lack? Will I choose to see the beauty in the world or the problems? G-d gives us that choice and when we choose to look inward, at all the blessings we have, we can be sure to be happy and rejoice!
Comparing ourselves and our lives to others breeds jealousy and resentment instead of fulfilment and pleasure. This idea is reflected in the third paragraph after Shema that states, “do not stray after your heart and after your eyes”. Why would it first say your heart; after all, we first see something we want and only then stray after it?
I believe the idea is that if our own hearts are not first filled with gratitude to G-d, happiness, and contentment for what we have, then of course when we see something ‘bigger and better’ we would want it. When we are truly happy with what everything G-d has blessed us with, not only will we not be jealous of others, but we can be happy for what G-d has blessed others with as well.
Exercise: Think of a time where you felt jealous of someone. Focus on why and feel grateful to G-d for your part. For example, if one felt jealous about a friend’s new car, think of your car and focus on the positive (ie how grateful you are to have a car that works, that has AC, a CD player, etc.) until you feel better about what you were once jealous of.
