Elul was a time that Yidden would work on detaching themselves from Olam HaZeh. Some would disappear from home for Elul. I remember during the 60’s when I learned by Rav Sheinberg Zatzal, we met such a Yid. He was called R' Binyamin HaTzaddik Zatzal. He lived in Bnei Brak, but he spent his Elul at The Diskin Orphanage in Yerushalayim. There, he spent his time alone and away from the world. He was: דֵדוֹבְּתִמ secluded himself, and he was very quiet. He was a big Talmid Chochom and was a Novardoker Talmid.
Elul means: יִל יִדוֹדְו יִדוֹדְל יִנֲא. This is a very important message: You have ONE friend in Shamayim. You need to develop a Geshmak in being alone with Hashem and thanking Him. Learning Chovos Halvavos is especially effective in connecting a person with Hashem. He created you, and He is your total life; everything else is total baloney!
We need to be nice to our friends and relatives, but we tend to rely on them. ַבּ חַטְבִי רֶשֲׁא רֶבֶגַּה ˂וּרָבּה'! ָא וּר ַה ר ֶג ֶב ר ַא ֶש ִי ר ְב ַט ָבּ ח ָא ָדם!. Our warm and comfortable homes, our jobs and reputations, our Retzonos and dreams and goals. Nothing really lasts. It’s all fake. We may enjoy a happy life with all the Geshmake details. But your only true friend is Hashem. We have Bitachon only in Him, not in people.
Chashuva Yidden during Elul needed their “space”, to be left alone with Hashem. The Meforshim say that the main meaning of Teshuva means coming back to Hashem and practicing Emuna and Bitachon. We can do this by thanking Him for such a great year, for all your limbs and your health, and for life itself.
When Hashem sees that you thank Him for what He gives you, He wants to continue giving you. If you spend your Elul thanking day and night for the past, you have a much better chance of having a good future and a good year. Thank Him for your Kishronos, for your Torah and Mitzvos; the more you thank the better!
Many Baalei Mussar felt that the best Kabala pledge a person should take upon himself during Elul is to see good in everybody. R’ Avraham Yoffen Zatzal was told by his wife, that if he would be as good in learning as he was in being Dan L'kaf Zechus, he would be a Gaon like R’ Akiva Eiger. He would fabricate all kinds of weird Cheshbonos to explain people’s shortcomings.
R’ Ahron Belzer Zatzal did the same thing. There are phenomenal stories about his extreme in being Dan L'kaf Zechus, and this was his Ikar in all of his Avodas Hashem! He became a giant of giants, a Tzaddik Yesod Olam, all starting from being Dan L'kaf Zechus to the extreme.
When you see good in others, you arouse Rachamei Shamayim. When you have Rachamim on others and insist on seeing good in them, Hashem will see good in you. You will be Zoche b’Din on Rosh Hashanah, and you will have big Yeshuos in your life. Avoid being negative! Not on yourself, and not on others! Your mouth is always a great tool you can use to talk as if you love and admire everyone. You automatically become a Tzaddik, despite the way you feel inside. Keep talking and talking positive, like a broken record, until it sinks into you!
Don’t forget to have Ayin Tova on yourself. Sometimes this is more important than anything; it may take a long time until you see yourself as a real Tzaddik. A person who thinks he’s a Tzaddik, actually becomes a Tzaddik.
