Based on how you describe your relationship with your husband, I don’t see why you’d resist discussing these issues with him. Of course, the way in which you frame things will make a tremendous amount of difference. Certainly you should never suggest to your husband that you think you “married the wrong person.” However, you can discuss specific areas where you are finding things hard, and ask him for suggestions. Beginning the conversation with something like, “I wish I could be more ehrlich in this area; for now this is difficult for me, and I wish I knew what to do about it,” will be more productive than blaming him for holding to higher standards than you are accustomed to. You write that you respect your husband greatly, and it’s important, and probably very helpful too, that he knows you feel this way.
You should feel free to discuss anything on your mind, such as your personality, your “frumkeit,” and your interests. While all these can cause friction between couples, having different personalities and interests is such a common problem that it is almost inappropriate to call it a problem at all. It’s just a fact of life that two people, a husband and wife, will have different and often clashing personalities and interests. This isn’t only due to your differing backgrounds.
