Rabbi Menachem Mendel Torem of Riminov was born in 5605 (1745) to Rabbi Yosef Charif of Neustadt, Germany, the Rav of Pinchuv, and to his mother, Liba, the daughter of Rabbi Noson Shapira, who was the grandson of the Megaleh Amukot of Cracow, also named Rav Noson. When he was young, he studied in Berlin under the tutelage of Rabbi Daniel Jaffe and later, under Rabbi Shmuel Shmelkeh of Nicholsburg, who influenced him to adopt the teachings of Chassidus. After the passing of his Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem Mendel became a chosid of Rebbe Elimelech of Lizensk who was considered one of the key figures in the development of Chasidus in Poland, together with the Chozeh of Lublin, the Maggid of Kozhnitz and the Ohev Yisrael of Apta. After the passing of Rebbe Elimelech of Lizensk, he became a Rebbe in Fristik. Many of Rebbe Elimelech’s chassidim came to him and accepted him as their rebbe. Later on, he moved to Riminov (Rymanów).
Before he became famous as a tzaddik, Rebbe Menachem Mendel sat in Shul for many hours serving Hashem and learning Torah. This caught the eyes of a wealthy man in Fristik who had a fine daughter. The Yid approached Reb Mendel and offered him to become his son-in-law. He promised that he would be supported by him. Reb Mendel agreed to the Shidduch. His father-in-law supported him and Reb Mendel was able to serve Hashem with holiness and purity, studying Torah, and serving Hashem day and night. He would fast and afflict his body by rolling down the mountain in the snow.
His wife was up to understanding the greatness of her husband and was honored to have such a husband and didn’t disturb his Avodah. However, as more Chassidim came to Reb Mendel, word came out that he is a miracle worker. Reb Mendels father-in-law was a Misnaged and oppossed Chassidus found out that his son-in-law was conducting himself like a Chassidish Rebbe, he became furious. He approached his daughter and directed her to ask him for a divorce. His daughter, who respected her husband and knew of his great levels, however, would not hear of it. The father-in-law then drove them out of his home and disinherited them from his possessions. The family moved out and lived in dire poverty.
Rebbe Menachem Mendel’s pious wife suffered everything in silence. She attempted to sustain the family with work as a seamstress but did not make much money. Once, three days passed and she did not earn anything. They did not even have money for a loaf of bread. “If we sit here alone,” his wife said to herself, “we will die of hunger. I will go to the baker, perhaps he will be willing to give me a loaf of bread on credit, and I will bring it to my pious husband, who has been in the study hall for three days without eating a thing.”
The baker initially refused to give Rebbe Menachem Mendel’s wife the bread, and she left the bakery in tears. But then the baker called her back and said, “If you give me your portion in the World to Come, I will give you the bread.” The woman made her decision: “I will not let my husband die of hunger, no matter what.” She turned to the baker and said, “Give me bread and cheese and I will give you my portion in the World to Come.”
The baker gave her the bread and cheese and she went to the study hall, spread a tablecloth, and set the bread and cheese before her husband. In the meantime, she remained standing there, which was unusual, because she would usually just set the food before him and leave. Rebbe Menachem Mendel washed his hands, made the blessing, and ate. “Why are you still standing here?” he asked his wife. “Oh, my dear husband!” she replied. “You know how hard I worked to merit the World to Come. And now I have lost my portion there...,” she related the entire chain of events. Her husband comforted her and said, “Have no sorrow. Just before you came, I was so starved that if you had not brought me food, I would have died. So, with this bread, you saved my life and now have a new portion in the World to Come. You don’t need your old portion.”
Rebbe Menachem Mendel’s relationship with his wife was very special. Interestingly, this pious couple is one of the very few couples that are buried next to each other. Rebbe Menachem Mendel discusses the portion of the World to Come given to those who assist tzaddikim: Even if in this world the wife assists her husband as a “helpmate opposite him,” in the afterlife, her lofty level continues to bring abundance to her husband and she is revealed to be more elevated than him.
For this reason, he did not appoint any of his sons as his successor, but rather, his primary disciple who was also his personal assistant, Rabbi Tzvi Hirsch HaKohen, who was, even as a Rebbe, was known by the title Tzvi Hirsch Meshares, meaning, Tzvi Hirsch—the Assistant.
