The aforementioned scenario may be a bit extreme, and we bring it to illustrate the point of how a person can take this concept to the opposite extreme. But there are many examples that are much more common. Perhaps a person behaves normally at public events, but what about the home? Does he use his avodas Hashem as an excuse not to help his wife and children?
This person may say, “Look, I am learning Torah now. The entire מעלה של פמליא is descending from Above to hear me learn Torah, and the Ribbono shel Olam derives so much nachas from me. I simply can’t be bothered. Surely my family understand... surely my wife won’t become upset.”
The problem is that although his heart may be in the right place, reality will hit hard when he comes home and things don’t go as he had planned. And the question we ask this person is: You see that the Ribbono shel Olam didn’t smooth out the way for you... the people around you weren’t overcome with a spirit of appreciation for you... what will you do about it in the future?
First, he must entertain the idea that his Torah is possibly not תורה לשמה—as unpleasant as this thought may be for him. But more importantly, the Ribbono shel Olam clearly wants our avodah to be one that respects others. One simply cannot be an eved Hashem and a yerei Shamayim without respecting others.
