By Sarah Chana Radcliffe
It's so important not to ignore his or her cries...
Your "stress" speaks to you through your aches and pains, your lowered mood, your heightened irritation, your increasing anxiety and other personal channels. It's asking you to pay attention and, most importantly, to help. Don't just try to shut it up; instead, take a few moments to LISTEN. What is wrong? What hurts? What does it need? When YOU listen and help, you can heal.
He's going to have a fit when he finds out what you did...
If you know that someone - a partner or child, for instance - is going to be very upset when you tell them something, you may do everything possible to avoid communicating the triggering information. You might delay, you might modify or distort the information, you might outright deceive. However, none of that will solve the problem permanently. Time reveals all. Therefore, the best strategy is to strengthen and prepare yourself to handle someone's negative reaction. Unless you need to be concerned about physical violence (in which case different steps will be required), keep in mind that someone's upset is not dangerous to you. It may be unpleasant and noisy, but remind yourself that it will only last for a short time. Also remind yourself that someone else's upset is THEIR upset; you don't have to join them. Allow that trigger-happy person to express him or herself while you stay grounded and relaxed.
