Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty, but everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.
There are three signs of old age. The first is your loss of memory, the other two I forget.
Middle age is when work is a lot less fun -- and fun is a lot more work.
Middle age is when you have stopped growing at both ends, and have begun to grow in the middle.
A man has reached middle age when he is cautioned to slow down by his doctor instead of by the police.
You know you're into middle age when you realize that caution is the only thing you care to exercise.
The aging process could be slowed down if it had to work its way through Congress.
You're getting old when getting lucky means you find your car in the parking lot.
You're getting old when you're sitting in a rocker and you can't get it started.
It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything.
You know you're getting old when you stop buying green bananas.
