In the second part of this sichah, Rebbe Nachman explains how the path of forgetfulness is especially important regarding the avodos of Torah and tefillah. Tefillah is the main way for us to remember Hashem, since it is a time during which we address Hashem directly and express our praises and prayers to Him. In the morning, we daven Shacharis in order to connect ourselves to the Creator and start the day the right way. Afterwards, no matter how distracted we get, we have an amazing opportunity to return to Hashem and renew our attachment to Him during Minchah. Then, at night, we daven Maariv and we remind ourselves that Hashem is close to us even in the darkness.
However, due to the incredible importance of remembering Hashem during davening and concentrating on our prayers, it is precisely at this time that we struggle to clear our minds of unwanted thoughts. Since the avodah of tefillah has amazing power to awaken Hashem’s compassion and connect us deeply to Him, the yetzer hara attacks us as we daven with an army of distractions, fears, worries, desires, etc., in an attempt to prevent us from praying with focus and attachment to Hashem.
In particular, one of the yetzer hara’s greatest weapons is to make us feel bad about past mistakes, both regarding material and spiritual matters, as Rebbe Nachman explains in this sichah: “Sometimes, a person has confusing thoughts about his business, or matters at home, and so on – that he didn’t do the right thing in this area and he should have done something else. And there are people who get confused during the avodos of learning or davening by the mistakes that they made in the past—that in this area they didn’t act properly before Hashem, and so on – as each person knows himself.”
In essence, tefillah is an expression of emunah (see Likutei Mohoran I, 7). Instead of trying to do everything ourselves, we stop and reach out to Hashem, since we believe that our lives are really in His hands. Thus, as we daven and strengthen our emunah in Hashem’s Divine Providence, the yetzer hara tries to make us think we’re actually the ones in control. He does so by distracting us with worries about choices that we made in the past – maybe we should have done something differently at work or at home. Perhaps things would be better if we hadn’t said those exact words, etc.
When we stop to analyze these thoughts, we can easily see that they serve no purpose at all. What’s done is done, and thus, the only thing to do now is move on and deal with the current situation. However, most of the time, when we try to fight off these thoughts head on, we simply get more entangled in them. Our minds wander even further into hypothetical situations. This is a big trap of the yetzer hara.
Nonetheless, Rebbe Nachman reveals to us the way out. He says that “immediately after something happens, a person should push it away and remove it from his mind completely, and divert his attention from it entirely. And he shouldn’t begin to think about it anymore at all.” In other words, the advice is to simply run away from foolish thoughts about the past and not even begin to get involved with them. In this case, the best way to win the war is to escape the battleground entirely by using the powerful tool of forgetfulness and blocking the past out of our minds (see Likutei Mohoran I, 72).
Forget about Mistakes and Focus on Tefillah
Similarly, regarding regrets about previous sins and bad spiritual choices, there is absolutely no benefit in entertaining these thoughts whatsoever as we daven. In this area, however, we face an even greater challenge, since we know that we must do teshuvah for our mistakes and repair what we did. Thus, it is even possible to think that we’re doing a mitzvah by going over the past and feeling guilty.
However, once again, this is just a trick of the yetzer hara to distract us from our tefillos, make us fall into depression, and discourage us from serving Hashem. As we explained previously, there is a time and place for feeling remorse for our sins and doing teshuvah, which is called hisbodedus. But in the moment that we’re standing before the Creator expressing our personal requests to Him, we have to remove these thoughts completely from our minds. On the contrary, right now we must strengthen ourselves by focusing only on our good points and block out everything else. We must remember the incredible nachas that we give Hashem with every word of tefillah, and ignore all of the spiritual darkness in our lives. And as soon as thoughts about the past begin to creep into our heads, we should forget about them immediately and escape into the sweet words of davening.
The Benefit of Forgetfulness in Torah Study
Regarding learning Torah, Rebbe Nachman also reveals several powerful concepts that can transform our approach and connection to this avodah. As we mentioned before, one of the main reasons that we don’t commit ourselves to studying Torah as much as we could is that we get very discouraged when, after all of our hard work to remember the Torah, we come away empty handed. We go over a Gemarra or Mishnah many times, and still we fail to retain it in our memory. Not only that, but due to our forgetfulness, we struggle greatly to understand what we learn, since we can’t remember all the parts of the section we’re studying.
Certainly, we should try to understand and remember the Torah, since afterwards, when we go over it again, we can move more quickly through it and comprehend it even more deeply. Nevertheless, we must know that Hashem doesn’t expect this from us. As we discussed previously, due to the breaking of the Luchos, forgetfulness is a reality of life, especially regarding the study of Torah (since after all, it was the Luchos of the Torah that were broken). Thus, our main job is just to be involved in learning Torah as much as we can with the awareness of the incredible nachas that we give Hashem, no matter how much we retain in our memory.
In fact, in certain ways, our forgetfulness of the Torah is actually a good thing, as Rebbe Nachman brings in this sichah: “And it says in the Midrash (Koheles Raba 1:13) that the reason a person is given forgetfulness is so that the Torah will be precious to those who learn it as if it is always the first time, since due to forgetfulness, when a person goes back over something he’s already learned, it is as if it is brand new to him and he treasures it.”
Once again, this is an example of how the tzaddikim transform the seemingly negative trait of forgetfulness into a positive thing by bringing out its amazingly beneficial qualities. It is precisely due to our lack of memory that we can find new excitement and satisfaction in learning Torah. Our inability to remember something makes it possible to renew our connection to the Torah and always enjoy its sweetness as if it is the first time we’ve tasted it.
Learning Torah to Get Closer to Hashem
Next, Rebbe Nachman brings the parable about filling up the barrels that have holes. Through this, he teaches us how to learn Torah only for the sake of Heaven. If we measure our connection to the Torah only by how much we remember, this means that we’re primarily thinking about ourselves and learning to satisfy our egos. Even if we don’t care about what other people think when we pass tests on Torah study with flying colors, at the end of the day, we’re still trying to boost our self-esteem based on the results of our efforts, without considering what pleases Hashem. This is even more true when we fail to meet our goals and expectations of ourselves, and we get depressed and discouraged.
Therefore, we must remember that the purpose of learning Torah is, very simply, to get closer to Hashem! The whole reason that we study the holy words of Mishnah, Gemarra, halachah, etc., is just to fulfill Hashem’s will! With this in mind, it doesn’t matter if we remember or not. As it is explained clearly in the parable, our job is to put in the effort to learn Torah and to be happy with our unfathomable rewards in This World and the Next World, regardless of what results we have to show for it at the end of the day. This is the way to eliminate the ego and study Torah purely for Hashem’s sake.
The Realm of Truth – Where It Really Matters
Lastly, Rebbe Nachman comforts us by revealing that in the World to Come, we will be reminded of everything that we learn. And even if we fail to understand the Torah, the main reason we learn is for our neshamos. Of course, we must always do our part to try to understand, but nonetheless, if we’re unable to do so, we shouldn’t get discouraged at all! Instead, we must remember that Hashem has unbelievable compassion, and with His help, we will comprehend everything in the Realm of Truth – where it really matters. Once again, this concept brings us to learn Torah lishmah – just in order to come closer to Hashem.
With this approach to the aspect of forgetfulness, we can have the incredible fortune of attaching ourselves deeply to the study of Torah with great consistency, as Rebbe Nachman says: “Fortunate is the one who fills his days with Torah and avodah!” We can eliminate all of the confusion and negative emotions that knock us down time after time, and instead, simply sit down and learn as much as possible. Similarly, with the advice of forgetfulness, we can block out the past during our tefillos and daven to Hashem with concentration and joy. Ashreinu!
This article is based on the Torah of Rebbe Nachman of Breslov zt’’l and his primary talmid Reb Noson zt’’l, as given over by Rabbi Nissan Dovid Kivak, shlit’’a. For comments, questions, and donations, or to subscribe to receive future articles by email, you may contact: [email protected]. To join The Rebbe’s Pharmacy Group on WhatsApp, send a message to: +1-718-207-1468 or scan this QR Code: You may also find shiurim from the author on YouTube by searching “The Rebbe’s Pharmacy.”
