Questions To Rabbi Mandel
Uncomfortable Eating in Public
Question: I am a successful Yungerman in an out-of-town Kollel. I have been especially successful since I started listening to Rabbi Mandel. Since I was young, I have always been uncomfortable eating in public. Since I have a family, this is not an issue all the time, but at public gatherings like Simchas and Shalosh Seudos at shul it is very difficult for me to eat, so I end up not going, or going and talking, and either eating at home later or before. This is not such a problem, but I want to break my Middos. What can I do to try to overcome this fear?
Answer: Try to do small steps in that direction, to eat a little bit. And learn Mussar, like Shaar Yichud HaMa’aseh and Shaar HaBitachon that speak about not being afraid of people. Always take that with you. A small Sefer, always, when you meet the public. In conjunction with action, you learn the Mussar. That works perfectly. Then you're living it. You're THERE, not just learning, you're feeling it, and appreciating what you're doing. And be Mispallel. Being Mispallel is very powerful. Be Mispallel that you shouldn't be afraid. It's going to work. Being Mispallel is going to do a lot. With time, things will get easier. Build yourself up a lot. Put down people around you. Don't make gods out of them. Realize that they are just humans. And do that REGULARLY. With time, you are going to be more comfortable with people. But do Pe’ulos, small Pe’ulos, like say a piece of Torah, make it in a pleasant way.
