Short Ones

The books all say that barracuda rarely eat people, but very few barracuda can read.

Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said, "CIGARETTES CONTAIN FAT. "

My problem with chess was that all my pieces wanted to end the game as soon as possible.

What I need is a search engine that, no matter what I type in, comes back with GO BACK TO WORK.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer.