Reb Mendel Hendler relates that when he was bar mitzvah, he went to the Satmar Rebbe zt'l, that the rebbe should help him put on his tefillin for the first time. His father wasn't there at this milestone because he had to be at work very early to earn parnassah. (This was common in America in those days. People had to work very hard and for many hours to earn their parnassah, and bar mitzvah bachurim would go to their rebbe themselves to put on their tefillin for the first time.)
Reb Mendel Hendler's bar mitzvah was on Thursday. Before the bar mitzvah, his father asked the Satmar Rebbe whether he could push off saying the brachah שפטרני ברוך שלזה מענשו until the Shabbos after the bar mitzvah.
The Rebbe replied, b'derech tzachus, "Certainly you can wait until Shabbos, but make up with your son that he shouldn't do any aveiros from Thursday until Shabbos, so you won't be held accountable for them."
Then the Satmar Rebbe added, "The truth is, it isn't hard to avoid doing aveiros for one day."
The Satmar Rebbe elaborated and explained that the tricky part about serving Hashem is that it is for a long time. For example, if one makes a kabbalah to learn more hours daily, the kabbalah isn't only for a day or two. It means studying more Torah daily, which makes the kabbalah seem difficult and overwhelming.
If his kabbalah is to daven with kavanah, it isn't hard to do so for a short time, but to do so every day, at each tefillah, seems too hard for people. This is why people give up and don't try. Therefore, it is advisable to make kabalos for shorter periods of time.
A hint to this concept is the pasuk (Devarim 4:39) היום וידעת, The Torah urging us to focus on today, to have yiras Shamayim today, and to fight with the yetzer hara today. Don't think now about tomorrow. And tomorrow, you will renew your kabbalah for that day. This can be hinted in אורי 'ה לדוד, when we say חיי ימי כל ...שאלתי אחת, I focus on doing just one good deed. When I want to perform a mitzvah, I tell myself שאלתי אחת, I request that Hashem help me perform just this one mitzvah. With this thought in mind, serving Hashem doesn't seem so frightening and overwhelming. And with this technique, כל חיי ימי , I will end up serving Hashem properly, keeping all the mitzvos, all days of my life.
The Satmar Rebbe explained that, therefore, the father should ask his son, the bar mitzvah bachur, to be clean from aveiros until he says the brachah שפטרני ברוך. For a short time, everyone can devote themselves to avodas Hashem.
The Gemara (Shabbos 105:) teaches, "This is the technique of the yetzer hara. Today, he tells you to do this; tomorrow, he tells you to do that until he convinces you to go and worship Avodah Zarah!"
The Chasam Sofer zt'l (Toras Moshe, Ki Seitzei יאמר או ה"ד) says that we should use the same technique in our battle against the yetzer hara. The yetzer hara tries to catch us, one aveirah at a time, one day at a time. We combat the yetzer hara with the same approach. Focus on each day individually, and grow one good deed at a time. Ultimately, you will see that you have grown immensely in avodas Hashem.
The Chasam Sofer says that this is hinted at in the pasuk (Devarim 21:10) ושבית למלחמה תצא כי שביו : "If you go out to war against your enemies...and you take his captives." This means we should adopt the yetzer hara's battle techniques. Focus on one success and then on another; in the end, you will succeed.
Emulating Avraham Avinu Step by Step
We wrote above that we should seek to emulate Avraham Avinu, but we wonder how we can achieve even remotely Avraham Avinu's exceptional levels. But the Ropshitzer Rav zt'l says that at the beginning of Avraham's service, Avraham Avinu also wondered how he could succeed in avodas Hashem. Hashem told him וממולדתך מארצך לך לך אראך אשר הארץ אל אביך ומבית , "Go forth from your land and your birthplace and your father's house to the land that I will show you."
The Ropshitzer Rav zt'l explains that when Avraham considered his origin—that he was born to a father who worshiped avodah zarah—he became discouraged. He thought, "How can a person like me serve Hashem? What yichus do I have?"
Also, when Avraham reminded himself of his youth, the days when he worshipped idols (as the Rambam tells us), he felt unworthy of serving Hashem. Therefore, Hashem told him, אביך ומבית וממולדתך מארצך לך לך "Don't think about your past or your imperfect origins. Go away from those discouraging thoughts, and you will be able to serve Hashem."
Rebbe Reb Bunim zt'l said, "If a baal teshuvah saw how with a single thought of teshuvah, his neshamah becomes like the great, perfect tzaddikim, he would be so happy that he left the darkness to a great light (Remasayim Tzofim, ch.18, 57, who heard it from Rebbe Bunim)."
A person can grow and reach high levels. It is within his reach; as we said, it is accomplished one step at a time.
