We wonder what kind of love did Avraham Avinu experience in his life, with a father like Terach, who gave him over to king Nimrod to be burned alive for smashing his father’s idols. (Rashi). Of course, we have no understanding of these people. But for us, it can be a great Mussar Haskel (lesson).
Avraham becomes the epitome of giving love to others, despite his difficult background. I’m a 4th grade Rebbe, who periodically tries to build up my Talmidim. For example, Chaim may need a special boost, so (step one) I ask Shlomy if he likes Chaim. Shlomy says “yes”, and Chaim feels good. But then (step two) I ask Chaim if he likes Shlomy. When he says “yes”, I feel that step two was far more effective for Chaim than step one.
The best boost you can give yourself is caring for others. You are a giver (vs. a taker), and you are automatically on top and not on bottom. You don’t need any therapists, or writing your Maalos all day. Again and again, I’m told that Yungerleit in out-of-town Kollelim are by far the happiest. They are “givers”, and feel needed and respected.
When Yungerleit ask me which shul or Bais Medrash or Chabura they should join, I always tell them to go to the place where you get more Kavod! Then you will thrive, and be able to do more for Klal Yisroel.
Guess where I got this Hashkafa from? Novardok! (R' Chaim Mordechai Wainkrantz Zatzal). A smart Novardoker realizes that you don’t just start working on Bizyonos. You need the proper: הַדְרָכָה guidance for that! Don’t look for trouble, unless you know what you’re doing, and only if you have a Rebbe and: מוֹרֶה דֶּרֶךְ guide.
