By Yoni Schwartz
Rav Baruch Ber Leibowitz
Rav Baruch Ber had a daughter who struggled for a considerable amount of time to find the right Shidduch. Finally, she got engaged, and not just to any person, but to an outstanding bachur, one of Rav Baruch Ber’s talmidim. He was a genius and had amazing middos (traits). He was a very refined and mature person, and very caring. They both completely realized how amazing this Shidduch could be.
At some point after the engagement, however, the young man realized that this was not the right match for him, and he decided to break it off. Rav Baruch Ber’s daughter was absolutely heartbroken; she was crushed to her core. Rav Baruch Ber, as well, was absolutely broken to pieces.
This young man realized that things were just too awkward to continue as a talmid of Rav Baruch Ber’s in his yeshiva. He figured the right thing to do would be to switch to another yeshiva. However, back in those days, to switch yeshivas, a person needed a letter from the Rosh Yeshiva. So, he had to get a letter from Rav Baruch Ber - a positive recommendation about him - so he could get accepted into another yeshiva.
Writing such a letter was incredibly difficult for Rav Baruch Ber. He was deeply pained and was afraid that some of his negative emotions might come out in the writing. He genuinely struggled and had the courage and humility to honestly admit that. That is why he asked five different people to meticulously analyze the letter, to be certain that there was no hint of any negativity toward this bachur, and that his chances of getting accepted into another yeshiva would not be harmed even the slightest bit.
Reprinted from the Parshas Bereishis 5786 email of Torah Sweets.