It is not for naught that Hillel admonishes us to be of the students of Aharon: love peace, pursue peace, love people, and bring them close to Torah (Pirkei Avos 1:12). Aharon did not passively love peace, he actively strove to chase after it, to cultivate it, and to restore it to quarreling parties.
Commenting on this mishnah, Avos d’Rabi Nosson teaches:
אחד כל בין שלום אוהב אהרן שהיה כדרך ואחד אחד כל בין בישראל שלום אוהב אדם שיהא מלמד אתי הלך ובמישור בשלום בשפתיו נמצא לא ועולה בפיהו היתה אמת תורת (ב מלאכי) שנא׳ ואחד מעון השיב ורבים - this teaches that a person should love peace amongst Israel, between each and every person, in the same way that Aharon loved peace between each and every person, as the verse says (regarding Aharon): “The Torah of truth was in his mouth, and iniquity was not found on his lips; with peace and fairness he walked with Me, and turned many away from sin” [Malachi 2:6] (Avos d’Rabi Nosson, 12:3).
The Baraisa (Avos d’Rabi Nosson) seems to be commanding us to be like Aharon. It is not simply good advice to strive for peace and cultivate ahava between Jews, it is an imperative to do so! Be like Aharon, the Baraisa interprets Hillel’s teaching in the Mishnah. Only when shalom - peace, harmony and wholesomeness - are found amongst our nation, will ahavas Yisrael increase and negate the sinas chinam that destroyed our Temple, exiled us from our Land, and scattered us amongst the nations of the world.
Riki Siton is a charedi woman from Bnei Brak who is involved in increasing understanding, respect and love between chilonim and charedim in Israel. “Riki is involved in Ayelet Hashachar’s Chavrusa Project, which pairs secular men and women with a religious one. The word ‘chavrusa’ is used loosely here, not strictly in its classic context of ‘Torah-study-partner.’ There’s another objective: friendship and connection (between secular and religious). ‘You can’t make a person become religiously observant,’ Riki explains. ‘You can’t change a person. You can get to know them, see them for who they are, show them your lifestyle. That has a tremendous effect.
“‘Don’t get me wrong, if you have the zechus (merit) to be a part of someone’s journey to Yiddishkeit, that’s fantastic. But that’s not the main goal. Eleven years ago, I had a chavrusa who saw our relationship as something of an anthropological foray into the world of chareidim. She had no intention of ever becoming frum and was entirely uninterested in learning anything related to Judaism. I asked Rav Aharon Leib Steinman: Should I still be her chavrusa? Rav Aharon Leib’s answer was surprising: if she wants a chavrusa with a frum person, I must provide her with one. However, her chavrusa must be someone adequately grounded in her own Yiddishkeit. ‘Because,’ said Rav Aharon Leib, ‘if one Jew will hate another Jew a little bit less (and hence, this will increase love between Jews), that too is chazarah b’teshuva.’ (Family First, Issue 903, p.25).
