It states in parashas Masei that when the Yidden were leaving Mitzrayim, the Egyptians were busy burying their dead, as it states (33:3-4) רָמָה בְּיָד יִשְׂרָאֵל בְנֵי יָצְ אוּ הַפֶּסַח מִמָּחֳרַת בָּהֶם 'ה ה ִכָּה ֶׁראֲש אֵת מְק ַבְּרִים ומ ִצְר ַיִם ּמ ִצְר ָיִם כָּל לְע ֵינֵי, "On the day after the korban Pesach, Bnei Yisrael went forth with an upraised hand, before the eyes of all Egyptians. The Egyptians were busy burying because Hashem had struck down their firstborn..."
Rashi writes, באבלם טרודים, "They were occupied with their mourning."
Why does the Torah tell us this information? What difference does it make whether the goyim were באבלם טרודים or not?
באבלם טרודים doesn't only mean "occupied with their mourning". It means that they were bothered, upset, and consumed with their mourning.
Or HaMeir explains that the pasuk and Rashi are teaching us the difference between the Jewish nation who believe in Hashem, and l'havdil the goyim who don't believe in Hashem, and the great joy of life that comes with emunah, and the suffering that comes from not believing in Hashem.
He writes, "The pasuk is praising the people who trust in Hashem. Engraved upon their hearts is the emunah that everything that happens to them – the good and the bad – is all from Hashem's hashgachah pratis. Deep in their souls, they know that Hakadosh Baruch Hu runs the world and leads every detail with hashgachah pratis. When Hashem bestows upon them His kindness, they praise Hashem for it. If it is the opposite, and they suffer, they believe that this, too, is from Hashem, a tikun (rectification) that Hashem decreed and planned.
"When troubles befall them, the wise think, 'Behold it is the nature of the good to perform good. [Hashem is good and only wants to perform good; therefore, it is undoubtedly for my good.] Also, as the saying goes, more than a calf wants to nurse, the cow wants to give milk. [This saying, stated in Chazal, means that Hashem longs to bestow His kindness even more than we want to receive it.] Therefore, it is certain that the hard times I am going through are good and will eventually result in goodness. As it states (Yirmiyahu 30:7) ֵַׁעיִוָּש וּמִמ ֶּנָּה לְיַע ֲקֹב הִיא צָרָה וְעֵת, 'It is a time of distress for Yaakov, and a salvation will come specifically from this hard time.'
Consider the following: Someone wants to buy fresh fish and poultry for Shabbos, but the stores near his home don’t carry fresh produce. The only store that sells fresh fish and poultry is far away, at the other end of town. He goes there in the heat of the day and buys a large order. He could barely walk home, under the weight of his purchases and due to the heat. He struggles to carry his precious fish and poultry, purchased in honor of Shabbos. When he got home, to his chagrin, he realized that he had taken someone else's order. His order was still in the store. Now he had to carry it all back... and then carry his own order home. Woe to the person he meets on the way... He is so upset.
But how would he feel if, when he got home, Eliyahu HaNavi knocked on his door and asked him to deliver the package of fish and poultry to a house on the other side of town, and to bring home a different package? He would gladly do so. He would feel honored to fulfill the request of Eliyahu HaNavi!
Well, now he has an even greater opportunity, because he is fulfilling a mission for Hashem. It wasn't by chance that he brought home the wrong order, and now he has to make another trip to and back from the store, while carrying a heavy load. Hashem planned it, and for his good.
As he struggles under the heavy burden, he should feel privileged to be doing Hashem's will. What greater joy is there than that?
When we realize that everything is from Hashem, we become happy with our lot, including our spiritual portion. Some people are upset that they can't serve Hashem (in what they perceive to be) a better manner. But if they knew that Hashem planned their situation, they would be happy with the avodas Hashem that they can do. We will explain this with a parable:
Someone came to the king and said, "I admire the great king immensely, and I want to serve you. Send me on any mission, and I will fulfill it."
The king handed him an envelope and asked him to deliver it to the king of a faraway country. The loyal citizen is excited by the opportunity to serve the king and is determined to deliver the letter as quickly and as proficiently as possible. He calculates that the quickest route is by sea, but when he arrives at the port, he sees that the ship has just pulled out of the harbor. He calls to the sailors to return, but they ignore him. The next ship to that country is scheduled to leave in half a year.
Having no choice, he sets out for the distant country on horseback. He feels devastated as he rides to the other country. He wanted to do the king’s bidding, and now he must travel by land, which takes much longer. Throughout the trip, he moans, “If only I had arrived at the port a few minutes earlier. If only I'd been swifter, I would have been able to do the king’s will in the best way.”
Now, let’s change the story a bit. The king gave the letter to his loyal citizen and said, “I don’t want you to travel by sea (although it’s the shortest route) because there might be thieves on board, who might steal the letter from you. I want you to travel by land and deliver the letter...”
How would he feel during the long land journey? He would be happy with each part of the journey. Although it is far away, he knows he is carrying out the king’s will with every leg of the journey.
The moral of the story is to believe that everything that happens to a person is bashert, planned from Above. One thinks, “If not for my circumstances, I would be able to serve Hashem better,” but Hashem wants you to serve Him amidst your hardships and struggles. The situation you are in is the one that Hashem planned and chose for you.
"Similarly, it states (Tehillim 117:2) עָל ֵינוּ גָבַר כִּי חַס ְדּוֹ, 'For His kindness has overwhelmed us.' [The word גָבַר represents gevurah, midas hadin, harsh judgment.] This means that, at times, Hashem leads His nation in a mode of גבורה, harsh judgment. Even so, I know that Hashem's chesed is concealed within the gevurah, because Hashem's way is to do kindness, and not bad, chas v'shalom. This is the meaning of גָבַר כִּי, even when Hashem is performing deeds of gevurah, harsh justice, חַס ְדּוֹ עָל ֵינוּ, Bnei Yisrael know that for them it is Hashem's chesed. Within the gevurah is concealed Hashem's chesed. They know that (Yirmiyahu 30:7) לְיַע ֲקֹב הִיא צָרָה וְעֵת, even when they go through hard times,ֵַׁעיִוָּש וּמִמ ֶּנָּה , a salvation will emerge from the difficulties themselves.
"This is the way of the true tzaddikim, who are loyal to Hashem in their hearts. Whatever happens to them, whether it is good or bad, they don't say that their wisdom gave them success, or that the troubles that happened to them were because they lacked wisdom. They are bound to Hashem, the One Who decrees, with their 248 limbs and with their 365 sinews.
"However, those people who lack this emunah attribute their success to their intelligence. They think that their savviness brought them their success. And when the wheel turns against them, and they suffer r'l, they forget that this, too, was from Hashem. They say that it happened because they weren't cautious enough. They attribute their problems to their poor choices.
"Therefore, it states in parashas Masei (33:4) בָּהֶם 'ה ה ִכָּה ֶׁראֲש אֵת מְק ַבְּרִים וּמ ִצְר ַיִם, " The Egyptians were busy burying because Hashem had struck down their firstborn..." and Rashi clarifies באבלם טרודים, "They were occupied and totally involved and disturbed with their mourning."
Rashi is saying that the Mitzrim didn't realize that their suffering was from Hashem. They forgot about that. Their entire focus was on their tzarah and their mourning. But the truth is (Yeshayah 63:9) צָר לוֹ צָרָתָם בְּכָל, 'In all their trouble, Hashem has distress." Therefore, Rashi writes באבלם טרודים, they were occupied in their mourning. In comparison, tzaddikim aren't focused at all on their tzaros. Their focus is that the tzarah came from Above, and with that perspective, it is good for them in this world and the next.
In fact, many Yidden leaving Mitzrayim were also mourning because, as it states (Shemos 13:18) ע ָלוּ וַחֲמֻשִׁים מ ִצְר ָיִם מֵאֶרֶץ יִשְׂרָאֵל בְנֵי, and Rashi writes that ִׁיםוַחֲמֻש teaches us that only 1/5th of Yidden left Mitzrayim. Others say that only 1/50, or 1/500 of Yidden left Mitzrayim. The remaining died during makas choshech. So, there were many levayos, and Yidden were in mourning. But they weren't באבלם טרודים, consumed in their mourning, as the goyim were. They kept the halachos, but didn't lose their peace of mind.
The Yismach Yisrael zy'a asks why the Torah obligates us with the laws of aveilus. Even without the halachos that the Torah and Chazal established, everyone would mourn. L'havdil, even goyim mourn at such times.
He answers that Hashem wants us to be happy at all times. Therefore, Hashem made mourning a mitzvah. And it says, (Tehillim 19:9) לֵב מְשַׂמְּחֵי יְש ָׁרִים 'ה פִּק ּוּדֵי, "The mitzvos of Hashem are upright, causing the heart to rejoice." Now that mourning is a mitzvah, one can do it with the joy of a mitzvah.
At a nichum aveilim, the Avnei Nezer zt'l said that ל"אב is roshei teivos for יסטיגל יןב יךא, "I am happy." People asked him for a source, and he replied that the source is Rashi in Gemara Succah. He was referring to Succah (25a, Rashi דרשות טרדא ה"ד). Rashi writes, "Although one is obligated to practice the laws of aveilos, such as not wearing shoes, and not washing to show honor to the dead, one isn't obligated to feel distress."
The Chazon Ish zt'l said the following in the name of the Brisker Rav zt'l: It is known that prophecy can come to navi only when he is happy. So, how did Yirmiyahu HaNavi receive the nevuah of Megilas Eichah? How could he receive and say the sad words of Megilas Eichah, and be in a state of simchah? This proves that mourning isn’t necessarily a contradiction to happiness.
The Baal Shem Tov HaKadosh said that each person goes through the 42 journeys in his life, similar to the Jewish nation in the desert, who had 42 מסעות ב"מ, travels (see Degel Machaneh Efraim, Masei). However, the Torah warns us (Vayikra 18:3) תַעֲשׂוּ לֹא ּבָּה ׁ ַבְת ֶּםיְש ֶׁראֲש מ ִצְר ַיִם אֶרֶץ כְּמַעֲשֵׂה, "Like the deeds of the land of Egypt, in which you dwelled, you shall not do." This means don't be like them. They go through the life-journey באבלם טרודים, occupied with their mourning. But the Jewish nation passes all situations with emunah in Hashem. They go through the trials of life with bitachon, yishuv hadaas, and joy.
At the end of parashas Masei, it is noted that the parashah contains 132 pasukim, and that the siman is חולה מחלה (which is gematriya 132). The siman provided is unusual. Couldn’t a happier siman have been used? Why use a siman which means illness? חולה מחלה are two words for illness!
Reb Chaim Kanievsky zt’l answers that מחלה isn’t translated as "illness". It refers to one of the Bnos Tzelafchad, mentioned at the end of parashas Masei, as it states (36:11) צלפחד בנות ונעה ומלכה וחלגה ותרצה מחלה ותהינה לנשים דדיהן לבני. The pasuk tells us that the daughters of Tzelafchad (including Machlah) married their cousins.
Also, חולה doesn't mean illness, it means dancing, as Chazal tell us that on the fifteenth of Av, the girls would go out dancing במחול, in a circle. So, חולה מחלה, means Machlah got married and there was dancing. Let us learn from this that when we think something is bad, an illness, or any other tzarah, r'l, be aware that if you look deeper, you will understand that it could be a reason for happiness.
The Divrei Yisrael of Modzhitz zt’l needed to have surgery done in Berlin, Germany, and due to the circumstances of his illness, it had to be performed without anesthesia. While they were operating on him, he looked out the window and saw the beautiful buildings of Berlin. He was inspired to compose a song on the words, תחתיה שאול עד מושפלת האלקים ועיר בנויה תילה על עיר כל בראותי ואהמיה אלקים אזכרה, "I remember, Hashem, and I moan, when I see every city built upon their mountains, while the city of Hashem (Yerushalayim) is lowered to the lowest levels." This beautiful composition contains thirty-two stanzas. He composed it during the operation without anesthesia.
The doctor asked Reb Yisrael of Modzhitz how he was able to take such unfathomable pain so well. The Rebbe replied, "Do you think I'm not human? I also feel the pain. But I turn each sensation of pain into a song for Hashem."
This is the way of a Yid who believes that everything is from Hashem, and for his good. The pain is felt, it isn't easy, but it is transformed into beautiful praises of gratitude to Hashem.
The Gemara (Taanis 21a) says that Nachum Ish Gam Zu was blind in both eyes. He was called Ish Gam Zu because he would always say, "Gam zu l'tovah," "This, too, is for the good."
The word צִיר has several translations. One interpretation can mean a shaliach, messenger (see Mishlei 25:13, לְשֹׁלְחָיו נֶאֱמָן צִיר). A second translation of צִיר is pain (see Yeshayah 21:3, מ ָ לְ אוּ כֵּן עַל יוֹלֵדָה כְּצִירֵי אֲח ָזוּנִי צִירִים ח ַלְחָלָה מָת ְנַי). This hints to us that the painful things we go through are messengers sent from Hashem, and their purpose is for our good. Then we merit the third translation of צִיר, which is a door hinge (see Mishlei 26:14, ֶתה ַדֶּל ּצִירָה עַל תִּס ּוֹב). This means to know that all tzaros and hardships are a messenger, for our good. This awareness will open up all doors of salvation.
