It’s important to differentiate between situations where a solution or suggestion is warranted, and those where only a change in the situation will help. I’ve given classes teaching EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), and one of the introductions I give is that not all problems can be solved by resolving the emotional stress that a problem causes. Resolving your anger at the landlord, who is not providing heat in the winter, may make things less stressful, but it won’t warm your home. You need to deal with the situation.
There do exist situations that are not meant to be tolerated, and where the only “solution” is removing ourselves from the scene. When it comes to a spouse or one’s children, one must do everything and anything to make it “work,” because these are the people you want to spend the rest of your life with. When it comes to other people, such as colleagues at work, sometimes the most effective method of resolving difficulties is staying away. You can always try and wrack your brains to come up with ideas for improving things, but in cases where you simply can’t control the other person’s response, there really may be no other way of dealing with something than distancing yourself somewhat.
It would be a shame to have to spend less time with your in-laws, but sometimes you’ve tried everything already, and the only solution is to reduce the amount of time spent at their home. It is possible to do this without too much grief or hurt feelings.
