Dear Alumni Sheyichyu!
Sholom U’Brocho!
Mazeltov to Sholom Tauber on the occasion of his engagement. May he use out the period of yokor mikol yokor to its’ utmost! Mazel tov to Rabbi and Mrs. Mordy Kurtz on the birth of their son. May they bring him up lTOveCHuMAA”T mitoch harchovo, and to be a true chayol! (If anyone is aware of any mazeltov’s that I omitted please let me know).
Thank you as always for the feedback, it is much appreciated.
A chosid was in yechidus with the Rebbe. During the yechidus, the Rebbe suddenly remarked to the chosid “Dukumst mir doch a choiv” [There is a debt that you owe me]. The chosid was puzzled, unsure about what the Rebbe was referring to. But, the custom of a chosid was not to ask the Rebbe questions, but rather, to stand and listen with complete bittul.
In fact, upon further consideration, the chosid did have an idea of what this debt may be about. This dated back to an incident before 5710, during the nesius of the Frierdige Rebbe:
It is well known that the Frierdige Rebbe’s farbrengens were very restricted. Bochurim, especially, were – for the most part - not permitted to attend. However, while various members of the household took pains to enforce these restrictions, the Rebbe and the Rebbitzen went out of their way to try to accommodate as many extra guests as possible (who wanted an opportunity to be present at these farbrengens).
This particular chosid, who had been a bochur at the time, had, in fact, managed to smuggle himself into a farbrengen of the Frierdige Rebbe. However, during the course of the farbrengen, some of the “border guards” were making their rounds to enforce the “immigration laws”, and this bochur found himself in danger of being deported. At that point the Rebbe helped him hide in a closet, and he was able to successfully avoid detection, and stay for the remainder of the farbrengen.
The chosid assumed that it was this incident that the Rebbe was alluding to when he referred to a debt. However, he didn’t know what specifically the Rebbe was demanding of him, or how he could go about repaying this debt.
When this repeated itself during a second yechidus, with the Rebbe again commenting “Dukumst mir doch a choiv”, the chosid felt very pressured to react in some way, but was very confused as to what was expected of him.
Sometime after the second yechidus, the chosid was in Montreal (where he resided), and R’ Shmuel Levitin was farbrenging there. During the farbrengen, R’ Shmuel told a story of a chosid of the Rebbe Rashab who owed money to the Rebbe Rashab (literally, he had a monetary debt to the Rebbe). Once during a yechidus, the Rebbe mentioned that he had to repay the debt. The chosid replied that in that case he will have to have arichus yomim (because he foresees the repayment taking a very long time), and the Rebbe smiled.
When the chosid in our story heard this story, he became very excited, convinced that he now knew the meaning of the Rebbe’s words to him; - he had no doubt that this story was an answer to his query, and the Rebbe wanted a similar response from him.
The next time he was in yechidus, when the Rebbe again mentioned “Dukumst mir doch a choiv”, the chosid gathered his courage, and replied “Ess vet ober darfen nemment zeit” [OK, but it will need to take some time]. The Rebbe nodded and said “mhmm”, and that was the last that the matter was ever brought up.’
At one point (years later), the chosid was diagnosed with a very advanced and severe form of cancer lo aleinu. The doctors did not see much hope, and they wanted to immediately begin aggressive treatment in order to manage it to some degree. The chosid however refused the treatment (since it did not have chance of much success in any case), saying that he had managed to keep his beard through the trials and tribulations in Europe, and he wasn’t about to do something that would make him lose it now (with very questionable benefits). Knowing how slim his chances were, the doctors, too, did not insist.
However, miraculously he recovered (with no treatment at all, whatsoever)! The doctors were amazed, and had no medical explanation for it at all. In his file they wrote that he is a walking miracle, and he lived another 11 years!
The son of this chosid (who had shared the story with me) added that he felt that the Rebbe bringing up the matter of the debt, eliciting the response that this would necessitate additional years, was the manner in which the Rebbe drew down this particular miracle.
In the Parsha of this week, we read the promise of the Eibishter לא 'תהימשכלהועקרהבארצךאתמספרימיךאמלא. The Eibishter promises to provide us, each and every one of us, with full and complete years, to allow us to live our lives to the fullest.
In the famous maamar on this Possuk, in 5712, the Rebbe offered a deeper meaning on this Possuk: Sometimes a person is afflicted by a spiritual illness, and the illness is the sense of self-satisfaction that is present in his avodas Hashem. He feels he’s doing a good job, he’s successful, and he gives himself credit for his accomplishments (and pats himself on the back). This sense of self-satisfaction puts at risk his entire relationship with Elokus; - it can drown out ch”v his ahava and yirah (his spiritual “children”), i.e., any feelings he may have for the Eibishter.
His prescription, his antidote, is (the Rebbe explains in the maamar) what the Possuk says אתמספרימיךאמלא: - The realization, and contemplation of the fact that every person is given a very exact number of years, months, weeks, days and moments in his life, and that the time that he is allotted corresponds exactly with the mission given to him and the time needed to carry it out, will cure us of any appetite for self-satisfaction.
Recognition of the fact that every moment given to us was given for a very specific purpose, and any moment not used for its designated purpose is a merida, a rebellion against the King of Kings, the Eibishter Himself (and these words in the maamar were said by the Rebbe accompanied by intense, heartfelt weeping), then we will be able to think about nothing else except ensuring they we use out each moment for what it was meant for.
In light of the above story, we can, perhaps, see a connection between the literal meaning of אתמספרימיךאמלא, and the interpretation in the maamar: When we focus on the mission every moment is imbued with, we then redefine our lives, our entire existence as geared towards fulfilling our responsibility to the Einbishter. That realization transforms our entire life to (rather than being, potentially, self-serving) being aimed towards repaying our debt, carrying out our obligations and responsibility towards our Creator.
And, as we see in the story, that brings in its wake the literal meaning of אתמספרימיךאמלא. Because if we are living our lives to take care of what we need to do for the Eibishter, to pay up our debt to Him, then we are entitled to, and deserving of, and undoubtedly granted all the extra time necessary for this purpose. There is nothing to discuss or negotiate, because it’s not for us, - it’s for the debt. If it requires extra time, extra years, then we just have to be given that extra time.
R’ Boruch of Mezhybuzh, the grandson of the Baal Shem Tov, was sitting one evening, surrounded by chassidim, when he suddenly declared that he wants to grant his Rebbetzin a get (a divorce). The Chassidim were dumbfounded, but, of course, who could question the holy tzaddik. Upon his instruction, a sofer was called, a document was prepared, and the tzaddik divorced his wife.
Then he turned to the chassidim and remarked: “Now that I am single, I need to find a wife”. The chassidim continued to listen in amazement, afraid to utter a sound. Presently, the tzaddik said: “In the neighboring village, there lives so and so, who is one of my chassidim. He has a daughter who is both pious and refined. Do you think they would agree that she become my wife?”
The chassidim stood there trembling, but one chosid finally found the courage to respond: “Without question, anyone would deem it the greatest honour to be tied in marriage with the Rebbe”.
“In that case”, replied R’ Boruch, “we don’t have to wait for their consent, as I can appoint you to act on their behalf” (with the reasoning of ןיכזםדאלאלשוינפב). They had a kesubah written up, and they performed the kiddushin. The tzaddik then ordered schnapps be brought, and told the assembled to wish him mazeltov.
Then the tzaddik turned to the chassidim and asked: “Now that the girl is married to me, do you think the wicked man will be able to do her any harm? I say not, and he will break his legs in the attempt”.
No one had any clue about what the words of R’ Boruch meant. But early the next morning everything became clear. It turned out that there was a well-known gangster in that village, who was feared by one and all. He had set his mind on kidnapping the Jewish girl, the daughter of R’ Boruch’s chosid. He climbed up onto a large waste bin, and was going to use that to enter her room, by the window, in the middle of the night. However, while he was climbing out, the heavy lid closed on his legs, smashing the bones. His horrified screams brought the whole village, and he lay there in agony and pain, until the police extricated him and brought him to prison instead. Thus the entire village learned of his evil plot, and of the miraculous salvation of the Jewish girl.
Immediately thereafter, R’ Boruch divorced the Jewish girl, and remarried his righteous Rebbetzin.
By acknowledging our responsibility, our debt to the Eibishter, the את מספר ימיך אמלא that permeates every moment, our time is no longer ours, but is the property of the Ribono Shel Olam. And, being the property of the Creator of the world, it is understandable that nothing can harm or hurt it. We need only to get our perspective straight, to know that our time is designated exclusively to carrying out the mission of Hashem. And then it follows that nothing, - no illness ch”v or accident or mishap etc. – can have any negative impact whatsoever on our lives and our health.
Our dedication to carrying the purpose for which we’re in the world to begin with, ensures that the Eibishter will provide us with anything and everything that will help us in carrying out this mission, including (but not limited to) good health, and peace of mind, and abundant wealth, and everything into v’hanireh v’hanigleh. And together we will complete the repayment of our debt, by restoring the world to the state it is meant to be in, with the immediate hisgalus of Moshiach NOW!!
L’chaim! May we all acknowledge and commit ourselves to do whatever may be required to “repay our debt”; - to fulfill our obligations and responsibility to Hashem, and may the Eibishter, in turn, ensure that every single Jew be granted plenty of time, arichus yomim veshonim tovos, and good health bGUR, and may He fulfill His promise in this week’s Parsha והסירותי מחלה מקרביך, and כלה מחלה.. לא אשים עליך כי אני' ה רופאיך, and, especially, may He cure and remove the primary illness of golus (מחלה gimatria 119, the lack of one iruf of Elokim) with the immediate revelation of Moshiach Tzidkeinu TUMYM!!!
Rabbi Akiva Wagner
לזכות 'ר ברוך מרדכי בן 'חיאסתר ש"ל רפוק" ורפוט" ואויוש מתוך בריאות הנכונה ס"וכט לזכות ב"ש ד בן מרים,'שיק" לרפושוי" תומ, ממש ט" ואויוש בטוב! ג"הנ רוהנ
