Parshas Naso includes the blessings the Kohanim give to Klal Yisrael. Following these pesukim, Hashem tells us, “I will place My Name on Bnei Yisrael and bless them.” Bilaam Harasha wanted the opposite — to curse Bnei Yisrael — and tried to devise a way to achieve it, even though he knew that Hashem didn’t want him to succeed.
The Panim Yafos explains that the reason Bilaam was not successful was because we have Hashem’s Name in our own name. “Yisrael” contains the letters “aleph” and “lamed” which make up Hashem’s Name. Likewise, “Yehudah” contains the letters of Hashem’s four-letter Name. As long as we are connected to Hashem, we are simply immune to being cursed, and His blessing will rest upon us.
Being connected to Hashem is the foundation of success both in this world and the next. In order to achieve shalom bayis, we bring the Shechinah into our homes; without Hashem’s presence, there is nothing of significance there at all. In general, wherever problems are found, a lack of Hashem’s presence is at the root of things. This can mean a failure to follow daas Torah or simply ignoring or sidelining what the Torah tells us.
Sometimes, people think that they should put shalom bayis “before” Hashem, before Yiddishkeit, and that this will actually improve their relationship. This is a terrible mistake. While there are rare occasions when (as the Torah tells us), ratzon Hashem is actually to “wipe out Hashem’s Name,” such decisions can never be taken without Torah guidance.
Fundamentally, no one should ever think that he could possibly gain from placing anything other than Hashem and His Torah first. There is essentially no such thing as “putting Hashem before one’s shalom bayis,” because one’s shalom bayis will only improve as a result of focusing on Hashem’s ratzon and living according to the Torah. Putting Hashem first means putting yourself first too!
