By Sarah Chana Radcliffe
It's natural to become defensive when accused of wrongdoing.. "You're right - I'm sorry" is a handy phrase that allows us to acknowledge the truth of someone's negative observation about us. For example, someone might have observed that we had just said something unkind. The phrase allows us to correct ourselves and move forward. Best of all, these words give children a powerful gift. They show them that mistakes don't demolish us, that is safe to admit error, that it's easy to recover and that they and their parents can be authentic. These words give children strength for a lifetime.
"I'm going to give you till 3: That's one, that's two, that's....."
When you use a counting technique to get your child to change what he's doing ("You need to put the game away by the time I count to 3...") take into account the "adrenaline factor." If the child is already crying and upset, don't use counting at all - he will find it too hard to shift his behavior in such a short time frame when adrenaline and other chemicals associated with emotional upset are running through him. Unless there is an emergency, wait until he's a bit calmer before you continue with education and guidance.
