Rabbi Yoel Gold told a story about a couple that was getting married in Israel right at the start of the pandemic. They decided to make the wedding quickly with just immediate family before Israel went on lockdown. Only 20 people came to attend.
Right after the kedushin, the mishtarah—police showed up, saying they received an anonymous tip, and demanded that everyone evacuate the venue. They were afraid coronavirus would be transmitted so the police slapped everyone with a 5,000-shekel fine and sent everyone home, except the bride and groom, who were required to wait outside against the building in the cold.
Surrounded by Police with Guns
Picture it: Tamar—the bride—in her wedding dress, David—the groom—in his tuxedo, were surrounded by police with guns, shivering from cold. By the time the police let them go, the wedding was ruined, and the couple was in debt on their very first day as husband and wife. The couple tried their hardest to stay happy, to dance, to cheer each other up, to not cry. As much as they knew it was for the best, they were so disappointed and heartbroken with how the night turned out.
Seven months later, David got a phone call, and he was visibly upset after hanging up. His wife asked him, “What’s wrong?” He said, “That was my father. A young man in kollel contacted him to say that he was the person who gave the police the tip at the wedding, and he’d like to speak to us.” “Should we go?” Tamar asked. “I guess so... maybe it will help us come to terms with how our wedding turned out.”
Felt a Tremendous Guilt
They went to meet the boy. He explained to them that COVID-19 had just emerged in Israel, and he was extremely afraid of the new virus. He heard the music and assumed it was a big wedding, so he called to tell the police there was a party going on next door at the hall. Since that night, he felt a tremendous guilt. He was also in shidduchim and usually got calls with matches. Since the wedding, not one shadchan had called with a date, and when he reached out to matchmakers, he could not get set up with anyone. He knew he had to apologize to this couple. He tracked them down and was begging for their forgiveness.
The newlyweds, so traumatized from the event, told him they needed some time. After a few days, on Erev Yom Kippur, they decided that even though it was so hard, they would put it all behind them. They would forgive him. They called him, and the bochur broke into tears, crying, “I’m so sorry for what I did. Please forgive me.” The couple was emotional and accepted his sincere apology.
They went into Yom Kippur feeling so at peace, knowing that they overcame a huge challenge, and they felt comfortable asking Hashem for forgiveness when they did the same a few hours earlier.
A Very Bad Car Accident
The next day, while David was building the Sukkah, Tamar was driving to work, and she was in a bad car accident. Three cars plowed into hers. When David got to the hospital, the doctor walked into Tamar’s room and said, “Your wife must have G-d watching over her.” The whole car was completely totaled, except for the driver’s side! Not only that, but the airbag should have deployed on impact, and for some reason it didn’t. Tamar was newly pregnant and would have lost her child.
Tamar said, “Hashem must have had a sentence on me. And in His kindness, He orchestrated this whole situation with the wedding and having to forgive this yeshivah boy, for us to have the zechut, for me and my son to be saved. When we forgive Hashem’s children, Hashem forgives us. When we hold grudges, they weigh us down and they’re very hard for us. And when we forgive, we become lighter and happier, and we become better people for it.”
Reprinted from the Parashat Re’eh 5782 email of Jack E. Rahmey based on the Torah teachings of Rabbi Amram Sananes.
