Pirkei Avos “a bashful person never learns וְ לֹא הַ בַּיּ ְשׁ ָ ן לָ מֵ ד” (Mishnah Avos 2:5)
The holy Rav Levi Yitzchok of Berditchever, author of Kedushas Levi told the following parable:
A Moshol:
There was once a great and mighty ruler, an exceptional extraordinary king named Berachiah, who ruled over the land of Hodu-Lo. This king Berachiah had a handsome son. The child was possessed of keen beautiful eyes, and his form was lovely to behold. He was dainty and spoiled. Growing up in his father’s royal palace, the prince lacked for nothing. All the most delicious delicacies were his for the taking; he feasted on royal breads and meats and drank from the royal cup. He slept in his father’s bosom, in spacious rooms filled with delight. A full pouch hung of coins hung strung round his neck, and the most fragrant perfumes and spices were at his call and beckon. All the king’s servants dutifully attended to him and bowed down before him to fulfill his every whim. All this was done for the sake of their love and fear and awe of his excellency, their king. For they all knew how much the king loved his son. Furthermore, the prince himself was royalty, as his father’s son, the royal blood flowed in his veins as we know a child is father’s heel (Eruvin 70b).
And then one day the prince’s heart was filled with vain and arrogant thoughts. They festered like diseased blights on his brain and took hold of heart and seized control of his impressionable mind. He decided to ignore his father’s commands and rules. When his father’s most trusted servants and advisors, those closest in one to the throne approached the wayward prince and challenged him: “why do you transgress the words and rules of the king?” the wayward proud prince ignored them, he turned a deaf ear to their pleas. He continued in his rebellious ways to do as he pleased and follow his heart’s desires even when they went against his father’s express will and command.
And it was that they continued to come and speak with him day after day, and he ignored them. The king, seeing as how his son’s behavior had taken a turn for the worse, took counsel and advice as to what he should do to turn his son’s heart around, how to rehabilitate his behavior and get him back on the straight good path. The king saw that it was no use and he said to himself, my son will not listen to scolding, nor heed my words, he has joined to sit among idlers and low lives, and my reproach will fall on deaf ears. Their company shields him from all rebukes.
A scorner does not like being reproved; he does not go to the wise. Punishments are prepared for the scorners and blows for the body of fools. Banish a scorner, and quarrel will depart, and litigation and disgrace will cease. (Mishlei 15:12, Mishlei 19:29, Mishlei 22:10)
So now I shall banish him before I will need to pass harsh judgment against him for his deeds. Then when his hard heart sees his misfortune, the harsh exile shall soften him and when he endures banishment from the palace, and hungers for bread and thirsts for water, lying in straw on the hard earth, when he endures all this discomfort and hardship then he will repent his misdeeds and come back to seek my shining countenance once more!
He will confess and promise to listen to me again with love, and then I shall uplift him to sit among the rulers of the land, to raise his station to a position of power and he will sit amongst the heads of state like a true monarch as befits the king’s one and only beloved son!
And so, the king commanded his most trusted servants to exile and banish his wayward son from the royal palace! The prince was banished from the royal metropolis and cast out to the towns of the commonfolk, the simple peasants who lived in farm homes where man and beast dwell together as one (Chullin 5b). Such commoners and simpletons who know nothing of royal comforts or kingly ministrations, care not for royal etiquette nor understand the prince’s position, station or honor.
At first the plan worked: when the prince arrived among such folk he was greatly pained and distressed to live among people whose behavior was like wild beasts of the field, who ate and drank and acted and even looked like wild shaggy furry bears (Megillah 11a)! To have to eat such coarse common food and drink such beverages, food that was at times raw or barely cooked like thieves in the night who catch their prey and rashly cook their meat rare for fear they will be caught (Rashi Shabbos 20a). Lacking zest, essence or flavor, plain coarse meats, no salt nor spice, tasteless and bland. No chairs nor table, nor cutlery, no forks or knives had they, instead they ate on the floor with their hands like beasts, ripping their food apart like crabs in the ocean. Afterwards they filled their stomachs with wild herbs, forest mushrooms and when they were full and their hunger sated, they then cast themselves down and lay themselves on the same spot to sleep and snore. The prince was in great distress and discomfort to find himself sleeping, not on silk cushions and brocade pillows, but on the hard cold ground, on the straw strewn earth.
In the morning they roused themselves early, each to his hardship and the day’s work, harvesting and gathering, hunting and farming. They knew no comforts nor even the simple etiquette of town’s folk.
He was unaccustomed to such hardship and discomfort, his stomach growled in protest, demanding the fine white bread he was used to, in place of the dark coarse country bread, protesting the sour taste of well water and tossing and turning all night to and fro in pain, discomfort and distress for lack of a true bed! Finally, he fell into a fitful sleep and when he awoke the nightmare was reality once more! . . .
But time heals all, and eventually he too became used to the customs of the peasants and country folk. Slowly his routine became second nature, his sadness and discomfort passed, and his heart grew merry once more as he had been in the past. Eventually he forgot all his former creature comforts and dainty delicacies, he got used to the rough life of the country farms and his youthful indulgences became a thing of the distant past, a veiled memory that he soon forgot.
Now, the great and wise king received word and news of all the happenings throughout his kingdom, and when he got word of the prince’s new customs and routine, he asked himself, what to do now?! If I leave my son among the country peasants waiting for him to come and beg to be taken back, I see that the longer he stays there in exile, the more used to and accustomed to that rough country lifestyle he becomes! Day after day his mind grows ever coarser and more unrefined, he will soon identify himself as a country peasant and be just like one of them and no different! Eventually he will forget about all the royal customs and the refined etiquette, and his station and position will be totally forgotten.
Then the king had an idea, he formulated a plan that was designed to remind the prince of his former glory and keep the idea of what royalty, grandeur and the honor of the monarchy meant in the forefront of his mind, despite his exile.
Each day the king commanded one of his servants to be clothed in finery and a suit of such clothes as befits a ruler. Thus outfitted, the servant was to mount a royal steed, he would then be paraded in full attire, surrounded by full fanfare, bedecked and bedazzled with the royal entourage playing before him to his left and to his right, mounted on a horse fit for the king, and they would all call out and declare: “So shall be done to the man that the king wishes to honor!” [Esther 6:9] And they would announce and proclaim to all assembled that this was nothing compared with the true honor and glory of the king in his own palace!
Then when this parade would pass by the prince in his exile, and he would witness the honor and glory of the royal entourage and hear how all this was but a drop in the ocean compared with the true honor of the king, then he would not forget his father’s palace and his own former glory.
Since this parade was done, day after day, the prince despite his long exile, could not forget his past identity. When he saw the former honor and glory as it was paraded around with the king’s servant, his heart went out and his longing for his father and his past grew stronger day by day.
He began to think how he fallen from such a high lofty station to his current lowly state in the gutter, among such coarse peasants. His thoughts were then actualized. Eventually his regret was strong enough and his remorse genuine, he returned to his father the king and he begged and pleaded to be accepted once more and forgiven. He promised to fulfill his father, the king’s word and command and he returned to his former station as prince and his honor and glory were restored.
Explanation and Application
The holy Rav Levi Yitzchok of Berditchever, author of Kedushas Levi continues and teaches us that:
It says in Mesechta Taanis 30b that whoever mourns over the destruction of Yerushalayim - zocheh - he merits to rejoice [when she is rebuilt.] Whoever does not mourn etc.
[The full text reads:
“As it is says “Rejoice with Yerushalayim and exult in her all those who love her: rejoice with her a rejoicing, all who mourn over her.” (Yeshayahu 66:10). From here they [the sages] said: Whoever mourns over Yerushalayim will merit and see her [future] joy, and whoever does not mourn for Yerushalayim will not see her [future] joy. שֶׁנּ ֶ אֱ מַ ר: ״שִׂ מְ חוּ אֶ ת יְ רשׁוָּ לַ ִים וְ גִ ילוּ בָ הּ כׇּ ל אֹ הֲ בֶ יהָ שִׂ יוּשׂ אִ תָּהּ מָ כּ שׂוֹשׇׂ ל הַ מִּ תְ אַ בְּ לִ ים ﬠָ לֶ יהָ ״, מִ כָּ אן אָ מְ רוּ: כׇּ ל הַ מִּ תְ אַ בֵּ ל ﬠַ ל יְ רשׁוָּ לַ יִ ם — זוֹכֶ ה וְ רוֹאֶ ה בְּשׂ ִ מְ חָ תָ הּ, וְ שֶׁ אֵ ינוֹ מִ תְ אַ בֵּ ל ﬠַ ל ].יְ רשׁוָּ לַ יִ ם — אֵ ינוֹ רוֹאֶ ה בְּשׂ ִ מְ חָ תָ הּ
This is most wondrous, how can we say that if someone served Hashem and fulfilled the entire Torah all the days of his life, will all his toil be for naught and all his efforts in vain, all because he did not mourn over Yerushalayim?! How can this be the sole condition?! Will he lose out on all the future promised good, is the future not the total and complete fulfillment and how can he lose it all for failing to fulfill this one condition?
The way to understand this is to generalize and categorize the aveilus and mourning into three categories: Mourning over the destruction of the Bais HaMikdash, over Yerushalayim and over the exile of the Jewish people. Now we can further add that there are two types or ways of mourning and aveilus and these are:
The simple most straightforward way: To realize that in the past when the Bais HaMikdash still stood and Yerushalayim and Tzion were at their fullest, and the Jewish people dwelt in their land, this was the most complete and total fulfillment and the greatest abundance of shefa and goodness that could possibly bless the whole entire world. This shefa and abundant blessing came through the prayers and holy Divine service of the sacrificial offerings in the Bais haMikdash the tefilos and korbanos. Nowadays we lack all of these and they are all missing. We are impoverished and downtrodden, scorned and ashamed, lowered etc.
The second way to look at this is a deeper, higher more refined or sophistacted vision: We mourn over the exile of the Divine Presence known as the Shechinah, meaning that when the Bais haMikdash still stood and Yerushalayim was built and the Jewish people dwelt in their land, there was a great Divine revelation of G-dliness and Elokus. And when we served Hashem we were able to reveal more and greater Elokus and be more batel and nullified before Hashem and His greatness and majesty, to serve Him wholeheartedly in joy and simchah and do good deeds and fulfill his commandmments, all because we had a grasp on to His greatness and awesomeness by Divine revelation that existed then in the holy temple - the Bais HaMikdash as is known (Midrash Tanchuma VaYakhel 7) Hashem concentrated His Shechinah [there in the Mishkan and the Aron.]
However, now that the Bais HaMikdash was destroyed Hashem's kingship descended and was clothed and garbed in sackcloth of mourning, this is aspect of the exile of the Shechinah, Knesses Yisroel. We also have to mourn over the departure of awe and fear that bitul and self effacment and nullification we had before Hashem, this is an aspect of Yeru Shalem - true full fear hinted at in the name Yerushalayim.
Now, the primary purpose of the act of mourning is to awaken and rouse ourselves to bitterness and mourning in our hearts so that we refine our bodies and refine our gross physical self. When we remind ourselves of our past and former glory and see in our mind's eye the former grandeur of Divine revelation that we once had in the Bais haMikdash when it stood and functioned, then our soul cries in secret and our hearts grieve in solitude over the lack of G-dly revelation. This refines us. So that when the future time of remembrance and delivery arrives and our exiles are ingathered from the four corners of the world when our righteous redeemer the anointed Moshiach comes speedily in our days, then we shall be prepared, fit and worthy to receive this great sweetness and love, the delight that shall be then revealed. If however, we fail to mourn, then our lack of grief allows us to forget all this greatness and goodness.
Then we will be unable to receive the future goodness as it is promised Yeshayahu 52:8 that we will see eye to eye, all because the grossness of our physical bodies will prevent us from seeing this and we will be unworthy and unable, incapable of it. This can best be illustrated by the moshol and parable [that we cited above.]
Now the matter is clearly understood, by meditating on Hashem's greatness and focusing our mourning and grief over the exile of the Shechinah and over the departure of the supernal awe and fear of Hashem, the Yira Shalem an aspect of Yerushalayim - Yerushalayim, thus refines us and refines our coarse gross physical body and gashmiyus and chumrios. Then we will be worthy, able and capable of receiving the Divine delights and illumination that awaits us in the future rdemption with the revelation of Hashem once more. As it says Yechezkel (21:4) that then all flesh and eyes shall see etc and point and say here is Hashem, as our sages Chazal said Nedarim 8b that in the future Hashem will unsheath the sun and all the righteous are healed and the wicked judged, these wicked ones are those who failed to mourn because they were unaccustomed to meditate and ponder Hashem's greatness and glory, therefore they remained coarse and their souls remained unrefined. Due to their base physicality, their cumrios and gashmiyus they simply were unable and incapable of basking in the light of the great delight and its brillance and illumination overcomes them, the great Divine revelation is too much for them to handle and therefore it leads to their ultimate destruction and loss. However, the tzadikim who did refine themselves and their souls were purified by meditating on Hashem's greatness and glory, because of their constant grief and mourning over the exile of galus haShechinah, awaiting and anticipating with pangs of longing for the coming of Moshiach speedily, for the revelation of Hashem's honor and glory once more, therefore when that light does shine upon them with the brilliance and intense illumination, they are healed and delighted since this is what they have been waiting for all this time.
This then is what Chazal meant that "whoever mourns over Yerushalayim merits - is zocheזוכה לשון הזדככות[ ] - to rejoice," it refers to those who keep the memory alive and constantly think about the greatness and glory of Hashem. They grieve and mourn over the exile of galus haShechinah and over the aspect of supernal awe and fear Yira Shalem of Yerushalayim and the aspect of Yerushalayim, and their souls are therefore refined and purified as we explained. They are zocheh -
to see her joy, because they are now a proper vessel, prepared and refined to be able to be a container to hold and contain thise Divine revelation of G-dliness and Divine delight despite its great luminance and shining brilliance. However, whoever does not mourn, does not merit this, he is not zocheh, because he forgot about Hashem's glory and therefore his soul remains unrefined and too coarse and physical full of chumrios and gashmiyus without the ability or capability or capacity to be able to hold or contain such a revelation of greatness and G-dliness and Divine delight.
Therefore, whoever fears the word of G-d and trembles from His name, for whoever the fear of Hashem touches his heart, should see to it to mourn and grieve over the churban bais hamikdash and the destruction of the holy temple, over the exile of the Shechinah and over Yira Shalem – Yerushalayim, the departure of the supernal awe and fear. May he cast away the veil of shame, and not be embarrassed by those who mock him, because that is external façade (Koheles 7:14) these correspond to those, and just as this is true internal sincere shame and fear this is but a sad mockery. Heaven forbid that any of us should be embarrassed or ashamed to truly mourn and grieve because of these mockers and scoffers and this is what Chazal in Avos (ibid 2:5) meant that “the bashful or ashamed never learn,” whoever has this façade of fake shame and embarrassment, he cannot fulfill the mitzvah of Hashem to mourn and grieve properly as he should because he is ashamed and embarrassed of what others will say and mock him.
Rather he should be ashamed of Hashem and be in awe of His honor and glory that comes from sanctity and holiness and then he shall merit to reach the true supernal awe and fear of Yira Shalem – Yerushalyim when he ascends the mountain of Hashem to reach Tzion and Yerushalayim with joy and song, speedily in our days Amen.
(Based on Dibros HaMaggid Maamar Bein HaMeitzarim and Kedushas Levi Pirkei Avos 2:6, Devarim)
