Question of the Week:
I want to say prayers at my father's grave on the anniversary of his passing. I know I need ten men present to enable me to say the Kaddish. But the cemetery is far away and it's a work day, so I don't have the numbers. Can I get some friends to join virtually online to make up the minyan?
Answer:
Virtual meetings are an incredible blessing. We can save thousands of travel hours and dollars, meeting anyone anywhere in the world at one click. But some experiences need to be live and in person. One is a minyan.
There is an energy created simply by being in the same space as other people. People bring out stuff in us just by being there. Without even knowing it, we telepathically pick up on each other's soul presence, and we activate
This is true even when just two people are together. But when it gets to ten people, it goes to another level. Ten is the number that goes beyond units, it is a collective. Ten souls in one room interact in a way that makes each of them bigger, each contributing to a group energy that is greater than the parts.
This can't happen through a screen.
This not only fulfils a religious obligation, it fills a deep human need. Human contact is a basic necessity for our wellbeing and even our survival. Just because you can meet virtually, doesn't mean you always should. No matter how much technology advances, Jewish practices will always keep us connected to our humanity. We grow by getting together.
I have no doubt there are people willing to help you make up the numbers so you can say Kaddish for your father. Use technology to find them. Send out messages asking who might be in the area, or who knows someone who may be able to come. You are a part of a community, not virtual, but real.
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