The Proper Approach When We Did Make a Brash Move
Every Action Is Either a Mitzvah or an Aveirah
What happens when a person knows in his heart that he can’t rely on any of the above cheshbonos? He knew at the time that it was reckless, his sechel wasn’t taken away... he allowed his emotions to get the better of him. He chose not to use logic, and he didn’t daven to Hashem to guide him on the proper path. He closed his eyes to the obvious signs that Hashem sent his way. He was too smart for his own good. “I will succeed.... I will figure this out,” he thought.
In such a case, a person must remember what the Chovos HaLevavos teaches us in Sha’ar Avodas HaElokim (Chapter 4): Every single thing a person does on this earth is either a mitzvah or an aveirah—there is no neutral territory. Before every move that a person does, he must reflect: Is this the ratzon Hashem or is it not the ratzon Hashem? He must speak about the matter to the Ribbono shel Olam, and daven that he should be led on the proper path. He must meditate on what signs he may be receiving from Above on whether he should be doing this.
Small Sins
Now, if a person knows in his heart that he shouldn’t be borrowing so much money, because he is at risk of not being able to pay it back... he took on enormous debt because he wanted to make a quick buck... without tefillah, without reflection—simply because he believed in his own abilities—then this move was clearly not the ratzon Hashem.
This person can conclude the truth: Had I davened better on that day, had I properly meditated on thoughts of bitachon, had I recited Parashas HaMahn and relied upon Hashem, I would likely not have done this. Thus, if his venture failed due to his neglect in these areas, then he did something contrary to ratzon Hashem.
A person must know that when it comes to aveiros, there are various levels. There are very severe aveiros, and there are also “lighter aveiros.”—such as taking actions that are contrary to the desires of the Ribbono shel Olam. This action of reckless and impulsive hishtadlus was a type of aveirah.
Sins of Lacking Bitachon
When a person internalizes the fact that he engaged in a “light aveirah” by going against the ratzon Hashem, he should understand that this is rooted in a lack of bitachon.
So says Rebbe Baruch of Kossov in his sefer Amud HaAvodah (Derush HaBitachon, os 24): The fulfillment of all mitzvos is dependent on one’s level of emunah. A person who has proper emunah and bitachon will always execute the ratzon Hashem. It will never occur to him that he doesn’t have the money or the wherewithal to fulfill the mitzvah—because he trusts that Hashem will provide him with the means to fulfill His will.
With this teaching, the Amud HaAvodah explains the words of Chazal: יחיה באמונתו וצדיק—אחת על והעמידן חבקוק בא, Chavakuk established that all mitzvos are really rooted in the one mitzvah of emunah (Makkos 24a). If a Yid has proper emunah, he will automatically fulfill all the mitzvos. The ba’al bitachon is never prevented from doing the ratzon Hashem—for he has a clear and firm emunah and bitachon. Nothing can hold him back.
When a person finds himself in a situation in which he has invested unwisely in a way that is contrary to the will of Hashem, he should recognize the foolishness of his ways. The fact that he went against norms and the advice of wise people was a type of aveirah, because he didn’t have the proper emunah and bitachon—he didn’t daven properly to Hashem.
Hashem Is Good—Without Exceptions
Rather than view his actions as foolishness or because he is a shlimazel, he should admit that his actions touched on an aveirah. In this way, the person will be able to remind himself that, despite his errors, the Ribbono shel Olam is ולטובים לרעים ומטיב הטוב, He is good and does good to the bad and to the good. It is true that you erred, but you didn’t lose the assurance that Hashem is good to everyone! The Ribbono shel Olam will continue to prepare for you what is best for you, better than anything you can fathom. Even after you have behaved foolishly, and even after you didn’t have sufficient emunah.
The Ribbono shel Olam turns over the world so that no one will ever be cast away from Him—that even those who have R”l sinned in the worst way will still have a way to return to Him. There are thousands of stories and instances in which Yidden have found their way back after committing the worst of the worst, R”l, because the Ribbono shel Olam has turned over the world for him to do teshuvah.... And you think that the Ribbono shel Olam will take His eye off you?! That He would cease being kind to you because you were foolish for a moment?
