Selfish Chessed
Now we’ll go one more step in the subject. We’re going to say now what sounds like a chiddush, but I want you to pay attention because actually, it’s a very true and practical idea if you’ll understand it. And the chiddush is that a person can also hit the jackpot with himself.
In Mishlei it says „חָ ס∆ ׁ ̆יƒ‡ ׁ וֹ ̆¿נַפ ֹמ≈לּ‚ – a man of kindliness is doing favors to himself. Now, the plain meaning is that somebody who does favors to somebody else, he should know he’s doing a chessed for himself. And this we understand because we know that among the rewards for gemillas chassodim is ָ ם„ָ‡ׁ∆ ̆∆הּהַז ָעו ֹלָםּב ≈ יה ∆ם ֹ̇פּ≈רו וֹכ≈ל‡. It means you’re rewarded in this world too for gemilus chassadim. When you're kindly to others, Hashem will make people kindly to you. And so ‘an ish chessed, a person who does kindness, gomel nafsho, is helping himself.’
That's the plain meaning, but the Gemara gives another meaning. Listen to this. „חָ ס∆ ׁ ̆יƒ‡ ׁ וֹ ̆¿נַפ ֹמ≈לּ‚ – If you’re a kindly man, you will do favors to yourself. You’ll make sure to take care of yourself.
Now some people will bridle at that. They’ll say, “What’s he teaching you in that place? A Torah of selfishness? A Torah of loving yourself?”
The Hillel House
And the answer is yes! But it’s not my Torah. Because that’s what Hillel said when he went to eat breakfast.
“Where are you going, leaving the beis hamedrash in the morning?” his chaveirim asked him. “We’re in the middle of a sugya.”
He said, “I have to do a favor for somebody.”
“A favor to whom?”
He said, “ֹזו בָ הּﬠֲ לו ‡יָ¿סַנ¿ַכ‡ םƒע „ח∆ ס∆ מֹל¿‚ ƒל – I’m staying at a certain inn, a poor little inn, and I want to be kind to that inn.”
You know which poor inn he was staying in? The inn was named Hillel. The inn is called “I”. It’s an inn.
Your neshama is staying in this hostel called a body and you have to do a kindness to the inn – you have to feed him breakfast.
By the way, that’s a good idea you’re learning now from Hillel. You shouldn’t go out without breakfast. Eat something in the morning, pas shachris. Eat something substantial. You need energy for the day. You burn a lot of energy in the morning up until 10:00 and therefore you have to have something to burn.
Self Help
So Hillel said he’s going home to do a kindness to this inn. And he quoted this possuk: „חָ ס∆ ׁ ̆יƒ‡ ׁ וֹ ̆¿נַפ ֹמ≈לּ‚ – A kindhearted man must be kindhearted with himself too. And it’s not just a play on words, a gleich vort. It’s a yesod of Torah. It’s a ratzon Hashem that you must be good to yourself.
And not just when you sit down to eat breakfast, you're doing gemilus chassadim. When you take a warm shower, when you go for a walk, you're doing a kindness. When you go to sleep on time, absolutely you’re doing a chessed. If you don’t take that sugary drink, that’s a chessed too. That's how you have to understand it. And the truth is, the most kindness you’ll do in your life is with yourself. That’s the plain truth. All day long, and all night too, you’re taking care of yourself. And that’s how it should be.
Who are You?
Now the question for our subject is who you’re doing the kindness to, who are you? Because the better of a person you are, the more of an idealist you are, the greater your kindness is. Who are you feeding, that’s the question.
The Chachamim say that ֹמו¿ˆﬠַ ̇∆‡ ָ ם„ָ‡ ∆ה‡ ¿רƒי עו ֹלָם¿ל – a man should always view himself, ¿וֹך ̇¿ּב יָּׁ רו ̆ ׁ ̆וֹ„ָ ּ̃וּלƒ‡ ¿ּכ מﬠ≈ָיו – as if there’s a holy man, a saint, a kadosh inside of him. As you lower the food to him, you’re dropping it down, you’re giving the kadosh something to eat. You hear that?
It’s a remarkable statement! How could you say such a thing – I’m a kadosh? Yes. There’s a kadosh inside, there’s a neshama inside of you, a neshama kedosha.ָּ ה ̇וֹ‡ י≈יה¿הַחָך¿ּב יƒּ ַ̇ ׁ̇∆ נָּ ̆ ָׁ מָה ̆¿נ – The neshama that I gave you, keep it alive. You’re a kadosh! And so as you’re lowering food to a kadosh that’s imprisoned inside of you, it pays to imagine that you’re helping him continue to exist.
Holy Eating
Now suppose you’re not only imagining that you’re a kadosh but you try also to make yourself more and more kadosh. Let’s say, besides being frum, you’re an idealist too—you’re not merely an ordinary observant Jew, but you’re a man of ideals. Maybe you listen to these tapes and you try to live with the high idealism of a Torah Jew. You open a sefer always. You try to be more devoted to Hashem and you train yourself to think constantly about Him. When you're at work, when you're walking in the street, when you look at the sky. Whenever you see a mezuzah or tzitzis, you utilize it and you’re constantly being reminded of Hashem.
Therefore, suppose you happen to be an idealist and you’re sitting and eating breakfast and you’re thinking, “I want to do a kindness with this poor inn where I’m staying.” But it happens to be a very good inn. Not only you have a stomach, but you have an idealism inside of you and you’re lowering that food to this idealist, a kadosh. Think: how great is your accomplishment, your achievement, the perfection of that deed! How much greater are your deeds now if they’re invested for the benefit of somebody who is much more deserving! Not only when you help a stranger who happens to be deserving, but even when you’re more deserving.
Hitting Jackpots All Day Long
And therefore we see now that even though the perfection of a mitzvah of chessed involves very many things, we shouldn’t neglect the highest level of accomplishment which is hitting the bullseye — striving as much as possible to do the mitzvah with the better ones, the more deserving ones.
Of course, every mitzvah is very valuable; no question about it. You’ll never regret even the smallest mitzvah that you did. But we’re talking now about the higher accomplishment of יםƒ ֹ̃ל¡‡ָך¿ּ„ ¿חַ ס ָר ָּ̃י מַה, of doing the rare mitzvah that Hashem actually is looking for most. And that’s an achievement that you will regret missing out on because in the Next World there’s no measure to the tremendous reward for that.
And according to what we learned tonight it’s not far from our reach. You have to desire it and daven for it and get busy doing it. More and more you have to be a yarei Shamayim who wants to perfect his mitzvos. And it’s very available to you because it can be fulfilled on all levels; when you’re doing tzedakah v’chessed to strangers, when you’re doing it in your home with your family, and even with yourself.
Have a Wonderful Shabbos
